time for dh to come home...

[alison]

Dh is home most nights, and does the whole evening routine with dd. The past two days, he's been out of town, and I've been doing evenings.

The first night went alright. I gave dd her bath, swaddled her, fed her, put her down to sleep. And as soon as I placed her in her crib, she started laughing and making spitting noises. I left her in her crib, and could hear that she was having a blast in there. Then it got quiet, and I decided to go in and check on her. She had done a 90-degree turn in her crib, I moved her back into her regular position. She only got up twice that night to feed.

But then last night, I got her undressed for her bath, and as I was carrying her over to the tub, she pooped on me. I didn't realize this until she was in the tub, of course. So, I had poop on me, on the edge of the counter, in the tub, in my hair (I had tucked some hair behind my ear, I think). So, out she went, and I had to start all over again.

And then, once bath was taken care of, she did the same thing that she did the previous night. There was lots of giggling, and she finally fell asleep after a half an hour. And then.... was up 5 times overnight.

I'm POOOOPED! Dh gets home in 5 hours, and I'm ready to hand this crazy girl off to him.

Do your kids go a little nuts when your spouse is away on call or otherwise? I know that DCJenn's kiddo was separated from dad for a long time...

[DCJenn]

We both went a little nuts after seven months.

The dude is fine for the shorter trips- like when the dawkter goes to Ft. Hood for a two day visit. The longer ones? We start to get on each others nerves after a while. We're (oddly enough) too much alike.

Jenn

[PrincessFiona]

Re: time for dh to come home...

Do your kids go a little nuts when your spouse is away on call or otherwise? I know that DCJenn's kiddo was separated from dad for a long time...

I honestly never had dh around to help with routines when the oldest 3 were babies. After fellowship he confessed that he felt like he had suddenly become a parent to 3 children.

He is much better about helping with the little ones now, but generally routines are more likely to fall apart when he is in charge. That's ok (as long as I'm not there) because he does his own thing with the kids and that's ok too.

Kris


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[rockgirl]

My kids actually go a little nuts when he is home. He is like this giant plaything, only around for their entertainment. It's great that he wears them out when he is home.

[alison]

Kudos to you all. I just wouldn't be able to do it without dh. He does a lot, and when he's home (which is about as much as he was during residency), I still feel like I'm washing bottles, throwing out garbage, doing laundry, grocery shopping, and on and on and on ALL stinkin' day!

[migirl]

DH was out of town over the weekend and I don't think my kids even noticed. Honestly.

[Ladybug]

I'm cracking up about the poop. I'm sure it didn't seem funny at the time though. I hope you get a good night sleep and recoop. Isn't it crazy how such tiny people can *exhaust* you? I never would have believed it before I had kids. They look so cute and innocent.

[HouseofWool]

Oh Alison, it is really hard. She will get easier, or you will become numb to it all. Either way.

[GrayMatterWife]

Do your kids go a little nuts when your spouse is away on call or otherwise? I know that DCJenn's kiddo was separated from dad for a long time...

My kids have not gone through any type of separation even close to the equivalent of that experienced by DCJenn's little dude.

Dad has been gone for five (six, actually, I guess) weeks now. My kids haven't gone "nuts" since DH left, but they are different ages than your little girl. They also see their dad via skype every other night. They have a connection with him--he doesn't feel as removed as he must feel to your kiddo. But, when DH was gone for seven weeks (interviewing for residencies...goober!!) back when DS was 4 months old, I seem to remember that DS liked to snuggle up next to DH's pillow on my bed (for two months, that pillow case went unwashed for that reason). Kind of like a puppy, I guess. It smelled like him and was comfortable.

And, yeah, I know that I probably shouldn't have let DS sleep on the bed next to the pillow. But it seemed to bring him a sense of peace. Sometimes, you toss out the anal-retentive, how-to-mother advice for what just feels like the right thing to do.

My dh is gone ... 3, 4, 5 nights a week. Nope. Things run more smoothly (from a behavior perspective) when he's gone. When he's here they're all riled up and excited to see him. I've realized I'm largely a single parent (task wise) who is lucky enough to be well-funded.

[Phoebe]

Poop! What a fiasco! It can be really exhausting. I remember when DH was about to become an attending and we had narrowed his job options down to two jobs, one had in-house call and the other was home call. One night I phoned him in the middle of the night while he was at work and told him he was taking the job with home call because the baby kept getting up. He took the other job.

[alison]

Poop! What a fiasco! It can be really exhausting. I remember when DH was about to become an attending and we had narrowed his job options down to two jobs, one had in-house call and the other was home call. One night I phoned him in the middle of the night while he was at work and told him he was taking the job with home call because the baby kept getting up. He took the other job.

I realize that 5 months is too early to have separation anxiety in the "normal baby" way where dd would cry at the thought of being held by someone else other than one of us. That'll come up in a few months.

BUT, because she's used to having dh do some of the things (like the nighttime swaddle), I just feel like she doesn't take me seriously when it comes to bed time. I guess not taking us seriously starts this early in life, huh?

[Vanquisher]

My kids are older now, but I don't remember a lot of co-parenting when they were younger either. I am hoping it changes soon. I don't get poop on me anymore, but I do have to juggle homework and baseball for two kids. Oh and at dinner, fart humor. In any event, single parenting sucks. I wish I could say it gets better, but it doesn't. It doesn't get worse either. Just different. Things work better around here with dh home. It has been nearly 6 months without him here. Only two more to go.

[moonlight]

Alison, I don't know how you and the rest of you do it without your DH on a nightly basis. I guess you just adapt? Around here I start and give her the bath and DH finishes up.

I can't imagine what your Dd is thinking about while laughing and caring on!?! LOL!

I really really hope you have a better night tonight!!!!

[alison]

Dh missed bath time tonight, and won't see dd until tomorrow after work, most likely. He hasn't seen her since Sunday afternoon.

Today was sort of spooky. I went in to get dd from her nap and said "Hi, sweetie, hi!!!!" And she went "Hi!!!!!!!" I know it was just a sound, but she said "hi."