First Day

[houseelf]

I am thinking of you. The first days of childcare/returning to work were some of the hardest moments of my entire life. While there are some drawbacks, I promise you that there are advantages as well.

Milk production was a huge issue for me once I returned to work. I tried to pump on the weekends too. If you need any help with this issue, let me know. It is a big commitment.

Best of luck.


Kelly

[MrsK]

Thanks, Kelly. I've been trying to pump on the weekends too if I wake before the baby does. I have a small supply in the freezer and I'm hooked up right now. I feel like a dairy cow. I stopped by the day care after my appointment. He was sleeping, having gone down for his nap about an hour before I got there. BabyK is not much of a napper and generally only takes one long nap mid-day. I didn't want to disturb him by taking him so I had to leave without him. It was okay. In the meanwhile, it looks like he's been taking about 5oz at every feeding so I'll be working hard to keep up. Now, if only work woutl pick up. . .

[Ladybug122]

Big hugs MrsK. I know the heartache of leaving your baby for the first time at daycare. It does get easier, I promise. The baby days are tough, but soon enough he'll be eager to go...lots of toys, games, activities, etc. DS loved it so much, that I actually felt guilty when I took him out once I changed jobs and didn't need the center anymore. Ahh, the joys of motherhood guilt...

Just want to chime in about pumping. If you are able to, I reccomend pumping after the first feeding of the day, every day. You probably know that prolactin levels are highest during the night and early morning hours, so your body can boost it's milk supply best at this time. I have been doing this for a while now, and have been able to build up a nice little supply. When I went back to work after having DS, I struggled with my milk supply myself. Hopefully this time will be better since I work evenings and DD's last feeding is around 7pm anyway so I don't have to worry about getting more than 2 pumping sessions in while at work.

[MrsK]

Seems it was a good day for BabyK. He did great and, get this, ate 18.5 oz while he was there. I don't think I'll be able to keep up with that. I'll have to talk to Ms. Joy and see how they are feeding him. I don't know if they are forcing him to finish the bottles or what but it's very unusual that he'd eat 5 oz in one sitting. They say he ate 5 oz each time they fed him.

Not so great day for mommy. He was too tired for our evening games and sing-a-long. I was really looking forward to that. I feel like I missed the best part of our day.

[GreyhoundsRUs]

Hang in there!

[scrub-jay]

(((more hugs)))

[MrsK]

Day 2. He gave me that WTF look again this morning when I woke him up at 5:30. Daylight savings time combined with DrK's early work day are kicking our butts. The best part is that DrK sleeps until he's just about to walk out the door while I've been up for an hour pumping, nursing, dressing the baby, etc. We did a sort of drowsy sing along, played with his books, and cuddled a little this morning. I'm feeling worried that we'll be too indulgent when BabyK is with us. Since our time with him is so much more limited, I hate to make him unhappy during that time. But it just isn't good parenting to forego tummy time and baths or to skip serving dinner just to keep things pleasant. I have an out of office appointment at 2 today so I'm hoping that I'll be able to get BabyK after. He should be awake from his afternoon nap by then.

[poky]

Oh, MrsK, I'm sorry this is so rough on you. I'm glad he's have a good time and eating well and that you're happy with the care he's getting, at least. I'm sure you'll get into a better routine, soon.

[ladymoreta]

You'll get back into the less pleasant activities soon. Go easy on yourselves at first. Big hugs - I hope today is better.

[JC76]

Regarding the increased milk intake... I don't have an explanation for it, but the same thing happens when my parents and DH's parents watch the baby while I'm working. I always tell them to give her a 4 oz bottle when she gets hungry, and they ALWAYS end up telling me that it just wasn't enough for her, that she still seemed hungry, so they made her 2 more oz's and she just sucked it down!! When I bottle feed her she seems completely satisfied with 4 oz and isn't crying or fussing afterwards, is very settled. I have no idea what she takes in when we breastfeed regularly, but the few times she's been weighed before and after by a lactation consultant it was never more than 3-4 oz.

I just assumed it was the grandparents thinking I'm starving her. I want her to be happy when she's with them, so I tell them to just go ahead and giver her more if she's upset and nothing else seems to work. But it KILLS me with the pumping, cause I'm never generating enough milk to replace what they give her.

Hope today is a little easier for you with the separation...

[Urowife]

Re the increased bottle size: make sure they are using slow flow nipples and also pacing the feeding a bit. It could be that he's just sucking down the milk because it keeps flowing. There's no way for him to regulate or get that natural ebb and flow like there is with breastfeeding. He may seem like he's still hungry, but maybe he just wants that comfort nursing? Does he take a paci?

it must be so hard to be apart from your little guy

[MrsK]

They are using slow flow nipples. I've given them 2.5 oz bottles and he seems to be taking them two at a time. When I had him with a sitter here, he averaged a little less than one bottle/hour. That would be about 20 oz in an 8 hour day. So I suspect that they are just feeding him more at less frequent intervals. Maybe he really does eat that much? He is into comfort nursing big time so it may be that they don't know how to calm him otherwise. He won't take a paci -- especially if he is already upset -- but he sucks his hands sometimes AFTER feedings. Maybe they are reading that as a hunger signal. I can usually determine whether he is hungry or just needs a distraction. He would stay on my breast all day if I let him. I've tried letting him nurse until he's done but I can't stand it more than 40 minutes. So, I usually let him nurse about 20-30 minutes, then take a break. He always complains a little when we take a break but will often forget once we start playing. If he persists, I'll offer a "second course." Generally, he has a big appetite and we got into a habit of feeding on demand because of his low birthweight. When I brought him home, his weight was below the 1st percentile. At his last check up he was around the 10th percentile which still makes him about half the size of the other 3mo baby in his class but is a lot of growth in a short period.

DrK is a bottomless pit. People are amazed at the portions he'll eat. I think our son inherited daddy's appetite. The two of them will eat me out of house and home. It's noon and so far I've pumped 11 oz so maybe I'm producing more than I thought too.

[Finding Equanimity]

sorry if this has already been mentioned, but another factor to consider is he may eat more when you're not around as a way of feeling "close" to you. In other words, it may not be that they don't know how to comfort him, but that he knows they're not you so they can't comfort him as completely so he drinks more. My daughter definitely seemed to do that. We got into a good supply/demand rhythm after a while but it took some time.

[HouseofWool]

MrsK - how did things go the rest of the week? The feeding and supply will settle itself out. The worst possible outcome is that he may need a bit of formula mixed in with the EBM you are sending. In the grand scheme, it isn't the end of the world, even though it feels like it at the time.

You had mentioned something about tummy time etc. Don't worry about it at home on week days. If the daycare is as good as you are describing, then they are doing it there. I remember walking in one day to find the director of the daycare laying on the floor of the baby room playing with Sophie during her tummy time. Give yourself a break and do take out or a frozen entree once a week to help alleviate some of the time crunch.

Hang in there, it really does get easier.

[MrsK]

It definitely got easier. By the end of the week, I was able to send him without crying. It also helps that things are so slow at work that I've been able to pick him up at 3:30 every day (not so great for my career though). They are doing tummy time there and I've already noticed and improvement in his tummy time attitude and ability this weekend. He used to just lay on the mat, sucking his fist and complaining. Yesterday, he was resting on his forearms with his head and shoulders high for several minutes (before reverting to sucking on his fist and complaining). He is also doing a lot better entertaining himself. I don't know how well that reflects on the day care but he's much happier watching a mobile or sitting in his swing than he was a week ago. It's possible that he's just matured a lot in the last week and I missed it but I like to think that the day care is doing good things for him. He is still eating more than I pump during the day. But If I pump on the weekend and/or before he wakes up, I have more than enough. So far, I've got our supply through Tuesday prepared.