Baby #2

[scrub-jay]

I guess I am just hoping that #2 is a little more laid back and sleeps a little more.

Haha, DD has been so good that we are convinced that #2 will be way more challenging.

[alison]

Haha, DD has been so good that we are convinced that #2 will be way more challenging.

You have a Lily!
My friend has a baby who is super easygoing. She was sleeping in 5-hour stretches by week 2, and by 10 weeks, was sleeping 9 hours in a row at night. Dh and I call easygoing babies "Lily."

[HouseofWool]

Alison, that lady was a kook. DD is way busier than DS ever was. He is a pretty calm kid, but she is high strung and DEMANDING!

[alison]

Alison, that lady was a kook. DD is way busier than DS ever was. He is a pretty calm kid, but she is high strung and DEMANDING!

So, I think a good experiment would be to put your dd and my dd in a playpen, and see how long it takes them to rip the thing to shreds.

[Urowife]

You have a Lily!
My friend has a baby who is super easygoing. She was sleeping in 5-hour stretches by week 2, and by 10 weeks, was sleeping 9 hours in a row at night. Dh and I call easygoing babies "Lily."

I want a Lily next time!

[HouseofWool]

So, I think a good experiment would be to put your dd and my dd in a playpen, and see how long it takes them to rip the thing to shreds.

3.2 seconds. Honestly, I have a playpen set up in my bedroom just so I can take a shower without her destroying everything I own.

[v-girl]

We're totally nuts. M was born as hubby started his research summer for the MDPHD program. E came 18 months later. On purpose. Why? So we could each have a baby to nap with. 7 years after E, we had K. Why? What the hell! Let's have our first three kids during med school! WTF?

While I would love a 4th right now (I'm really certifiably insane), we have two cars that only seat 5 people. The only way to have another is if we could put the kid on the roof or in the cargo of my CR-V. We're saving for a minivan. Then I'll just go over the top wacko and have a 4th. We plan to adopt more when we're in our 40s. Goal = 8 kids.

[Amiens]

We have 4. I always thought in my perfect world I would want 2 girls and 2 boys, and I got it. My first 2 are 19 months apart- it was fun, but not so much that I would have done it again planned. That transition kicked my hiney. We were in the camp of "Oh our first child is perfect and so easy, so let's pop out another one, and we will get the same!" WRONG! #2 was my hardest baby out of the four, easiest pregnancy and delivery, but hardest newborn and infant. He is now one of my easiest kids. The spacing between #2 and #3 is 2 1/2 years. It worked for us. At 2 1/2, ds was already dressing himself, buckle himself in the car seat, although not potty trained and should've very well been but we had power struggle issues, going from 2 to 3 wasn't bad. Now #4 the spacing was not what I wanted- there is 20 months between #3 and #4. I would have preferred 3 years, but I am glad that it happened. Between #1 and #2 and then #3 and #4, they have their special bonds- because it's all they have ever known. The relationship between #2 and #3 is hard- they fight the most, but I chalk it up to differences in personalities and being brothers.

Knowing that I am done, it is bittersweet. I wish I could redo my pregnancy with #4-- I spent the first half crying that I was pregnant again, and focused on "how could this happen?" that I missed the magic of it all. My youngest is almost 3, and we have been out of "babyhood" for a year now: no diaper bag, no crib, no high chair. She is so mature for a 3 year old, it makes me yearn some times for a baby, but then dh reminds of the sleepless nights, how it's taken me almost 3 years to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, we would have to repurchase everything, and on and on; not to mention dh has had a vasectomy. He says that if in 2 years I still feel the same, then he will get a reversal, but I think by that point I will have gotten to a good place. I am already in a good place, but glancing back everso slightly over my shoulder. For now, I hold my friends' babies, and then give them back.

[houseelf]

How do you know when you're done....? It seems like such a bittersweet thing.

Yes, it is my friend. I could write a post about this every day. I'm pretty certain we're done and yet just typing this brings tears to my eyes. Mothering has been the best part of my life and it is flying away from me. I can't wrap my mind or heart around it on an emotional level.

We have 4.5 years between each kid which I love 95% of the time. One goes off to K and the next one comes along. The oldest is pretty easily managed by the time new baby arrives. The times that it doesn't work is for things like double header lacrosse games in freezing rain. During polite conversation, I say that we have this age spread because it resembles what my husband and I both had for our sibling spacing. Amongst dear friends I admit that I could only handle one baby every five years due to the demands of a hellish surgery residency and fellowship.

Our first was a blessed oops and I was hell bent to prove to myself that I was mature and capable...This was stupid, living my life to "prove" I could do it. Now that I'm 37 and have a 9.5 age span, I wish we had one more oops along the way. Still, I want to leave the parenting gig on an up note, like I could have done more rather than being burnt out. I pray that I have a great relationship with my grandchildren.

I have little to add except that I think that this is one of the hardest questions to answer as a parent.