Originally posted by oceanchild
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More Children?
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It is a good point about all the other stresses of a baby besides the financial. From my perspective though, medical school is a good time to have a baby. If I would have waited until residency to try for DD, there would be no DD because I didn't see my husband enough to do the things necessary to have a baby in residency. I think we averaged sex about once every 2-3 months during residency. Then, when I did see him, we were under more stress, there was less of him to go around to help, and half or more of the time I wanted to throttle him. Ahhhh, good times.
I love big spaces between kids though. 6 years between mine, and it is awesome!!
YMMV.
If the only thing that is holding your husband and you back from another baby is the insurance, then get Medicaid. If there is more to it, then you'll have to delve deeper into that.Heidi, PA-S1 - wife to an orthopaedic surgeon, mom to Ryan, 17, and Alexia, 11.
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He has been very stressed lately however... he was working from home in our office for most of the year. I honestly function better when he's not studying here but I never really had the heart to tell him that, I thought he enjoyed being able to eat lunch with DS so I figured it wasn't a big deal. Well with boards coming up, he seemed more and more stressed and kept studying constantly. It's only January and the semester just started so I couldn't figure out why he was so stressed. We talked about it and decided maybe he should start doing his studying at school. Since he's switched we've both been significantly less stressed. I think when he was home, he always thought about something else he could be studying. But now that he's separated them, he doesn't feel the urge to study while at home.
My concern is, like some of you mentioned, that residency will be more stressful and more time consuming. Yes, we may actually have an income then, but I could totally see him being soo stressed that he would be completely against the idea. I know right now he is probably #1 most concerned with the financial aspect. I breastfeed my son and we use cloth diapers. We plan to do the same with the next and will save a significant amount doing so. We already have all the baby "gear" and so really the only cost would be the insurance. I definitely think he feels there's a stigma around using Medicaid, I'm trying to get him to think otherwise.
I really wanted to start trying this summer after he takes the boards. That way the child would be born towards the end of his 3rd year. DH actually suggested we try and plan it to have one at the end of 4th year. Is it just me or does that seem like quite possibly the WORST time to have another kid? I just picture him studying for the boards again, us having to move and sell our house while I'm running around with a newborn and toddler.
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As a group, we've had children at every stage of the process. I've moved twice while pregnant, switching insurances both times and delivering within 2 months of the move.
We are med spouses! We are strong! We survive!Mom of 3, Veterinarian
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Originally posted by houseelf View PostHi Kelli,
We're probably a bit biased as a group about baby fever. We have many large families on the boards!
Welcome to the group.Wife to PGY4 & Mother of 3.
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Originally posted by Crystal View PostIt's true. We have an attitude of "screw that medical mistress" and we tend not to wait on her much. (Hence I had our first at the end of MS1)
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This is probably bad advice, but can you just sign up for the medicaid and then let him see how well it works!!!! Eventually you might be like most of us here, we take care of almost everything at home and our spouses don't even remember which bank we use, forget them even knowing if we have insurance.Luanne
wife, mother, nurse practitioner
"You have not converted a man because you have silenced him." (John, Viscount Morely, On Compromise, 1874)
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Originally posted by Luanne123 View PostThis is probably bad advice, but can you just sign up for the medicaid and then let him see how well it works!!!! Eventually you might be like most of us here, we take care of almost everything at home and our spouses don't even remember which bank we use, forget them even knowing if we have insurance.
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Originally posted by Michele View PostAs a group, we've had children at every stage of the process. I've moved twice while pregnant, switching insurances both times and delivering within 2 months of the move.
We are med spouses! We are strong! We survive!
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@SoonerTexan - we're trying to wait to have children until end of 4th year/residency too - and it is driving me crazy!!!! hahaHigh school sweetheart and wife to an MS4 cutie, and mom to pretty baby J, silly Siamese kitty, crazy Weim, and funny ferret.
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Sooner - my offer stands. I live close to your work. You wouldn't even have to pump.
I am proud (and psychotic) to say we had all three kids in med school. #1 came in the first month. #2 came 18 months later (so we could each have a baby to take naps with). #3 was his grad present (7 years after #2) -- he came two months befor graduation.
I did work, but we had family and church friends to babysit the kids. The girls went to Catholic school not far from my work.Veronica
Mother of two ballerinas and one wild boy
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