At home daycare/Nanny

[spotty_dog]

I've heard a couple of au pair success stories (though one of those families also had a massive au pair fail story in their past). I'd look into it in your situation, since a reputable agency should be doing some thorough checks, right? Good luck!

[SoonerTexan]

Scrub Jay recommended an awesome book to me called Mill Memos. There was a good section in there about it with some resources. I'll try and post them tonight.

[oceanchild]

I also know someone who successfully used au pairs for many years, fwiw.

[scrub-jay]

Scrub Jay recommended an awesome book to me called Mill Memos. There was a good section in there about it with some resources. I'll try and post them tonight.

I'd forgotten about that section! But Milk Memos was a fantastic book for returning to work (especially if you are pumping).

[Ladybug122]

I agree with GMW in that $$ always helps. We use college girls for our childcare needs. We were lucky in that we found one girl who gave us names for a couple other girls to use when she is unavailable. We pay very well. In fact, on days where we must pay for my entire shift at work plus travel time (9hrs) she actually brings home more than I do! I know that sounds crazy, but I have to work a certain # of shifts and if DH is working and I can't switch days...there is no other solution. Obviously, we try to minimize these long days with a babysitter, but sometimes it can't be helped. Anyway, it is a large incentive for a babysitter to give up a Saturday night. You gotta do what you gotta do.
As far as finding a sitter...use a placement service since you are moving to a new area and really don't know anyone. Background check, cpr, and references, references, references!!!

[Lala]

A lot of people have good experiences with nannies from the Phillipines, but I imagine it's a fair bit of work to set this up

[Meenah]

I'm not sure where in NC you are going, but my niece is a Nurse at Duke and may have some leads (her DH teaches). My nephew is in Charlotte and they have a 1 year old. He spent months interviewing places and people. My sister is in Alamance County (Mebane / Burlington area) and teaches Early Childhood Education at the college level and routinely visits Day Care Centers where she has placed her students. If you are going to be near any of them and would like their info PM me.

[Bittersweet]

TS, I'm sending you a book of a PM

[MarissaNicole]

Perhaps use a placement service to begin with, and then looking at your local resources when you get settled?
DH's program offers help/resources with finding childcare but I'd think it would be hard to utilize long distance. I would also imagine that a resident's spouse would be a good option as NC is a huge institution and they may have some network you can use to seek out a resident spouse seeking to earn extra money.

Just remember that you can always change caretakers once you get there, so just focus on getting someone you feel comfortable with who can cover the hours you need at first.

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[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Thanks to everyone for their advice! Off to send/respond to a bunch of PMs. I'll let you guys know what we decide to do.

I think Marissa's point is good. I just need to figure out something for a month or two and then I can change directions if I want. That makes it more manageable!

[MissCrabette]

I don't know if you're seriously considering this, but I'd be careful about going the au pair route. I looked into this for a friend from Romania a few years ago, and it's not exactly what people generally think it is. The au pair cannot work longer than 45 hours per week or 10 hours per day, and I think that would be your biggest issue. There is also an educational component to the program, meaning that they have to have somewhat predictable hours (and transportation) to be able to attend school. Lastly, they can't be older than 26, which can be a good or a bad thing depending on how you look at it.

[Ravenclaw]

I know a friend who found a nanny through the day care at DH's residency hospital. The day care had cut the woman's hours and she needed the extra work. It worked out great because the day care, which was super hard to get into (18 month waiting list at the time!) had done all of the background checks on her. Might be worth calling and asking. Not sure which of the 2 universities you'll be at in the Triangle but regardless of which one you're at, both are so close to each other, I'd give both of them a call.

[Finding Equanimity]

I think Marissa's advice is spot on. You only need something to tide you over until you settle in. If I were you, I'd look for something temporary and make it perfectly clear that it's temporary. That way, you can maybe look into the other great advice people have given you, and not feel burdened to find the "perfect" thing right away. I'm not saying you should settle at the beginning, but if you find something that is trustworthy to start you out, you can really work on refining your permanent solution when you're in NC.

[Meenah]

I just sent you a PM with the contact info.