Toddler Sleep: I'm done

[ladymoreta]

How did tonight go?

[Thirteen]

How did tonight go?

+1


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[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Big improvement.

After prayers Daddy left and then we talked a little about her day (basically me just listing what she'd done that day and saying it was a good day), I sang Amazing Grace, and she seemed to settle. When I indicated I was leaving, she got upset and as I got to her door, she started to climb off her bed. I sat in the hallway outside with the door cracked though and when she saw I wasn't closing the door, she got back in bed. 25ish minutes later she was asleep and I pulled the door closed. It's too loud in our house to keep the door open indefinitely, especially with DH's pager/home call and him leaving at 5 AM.

So, BIG improvement. I'm so proud of her. Who knows if that was a fluke but it seemed to go much better. Obviously I'd still like to get it down below 25 minutes/without me having to sit there but I feel like Day 2 went much better. Honestly, even if I get trapped in the hallway for a few weeks, at least I can answer emails from my computer instead of from my phone on her floor. I just feel like leaving immediately was too big a change but if we ease into it more, it's going better. She's always been a fairly flexible kid (she travels like a dream and weaning was as easy as offering cow's milk instead) so I'm happy that this sleep thing may have some flexibility too.

I'll keep you posted but I feel hopeful.

Thanks for the parents of older kids chiming in too. Your comments about loving the bonding time at night with the kids is why I talked to her about her day. I'm not opposed to having some interaction with her, in fact, I would welcome it as she got older. I just also want her to go to sleep eventually!!

[ladymoreta]

That's awesome!!!

[HouseofWool]

WTG Miss D!!!

It will get easier for everyone.

[WolfpackWife]

T&S - that's great news. I've been following this thread and your frustration was palpable, I felt so bad for you. I'm so glad there was improvement and I hope the transition continues to go smoothly

[GreyhoundsRUs]

Yay!!!!!!

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

We've completely regressed.

It's now taking over an hour again each night as I sit outside her room. Tonight, I've read, prayed, and sang and then I left and closed the door. She, predictably, flipped out. But 20 minutes later is at least calm and appears to be playing with her light on. I don't care about the light, I just need a break. I cannot keep sitting next to her door. My back is killing me and I'm going on a biz trip tomorrow at 6 AM.

Please tell me I'm not traumatizing her?????? Please tell me that she'll eventually just go to bed. I tried the gentle method. I tried to soothe her. I tried to sit in her presence. I tried to sit out of her presence. It wasn't working. She was getting naughtier and naughtier in terms of the crap she was pulling to get my attention. I had to pull the plug. The new baby comes in 9 weeks. I am fine if whatever we do takes 10-15 minutes, I cannot spend an hour by myself with a newborn getting her to sleep. Some of you are superhuman but I am not and I'm over sitting and crying outside her door and praying she'll go to sleep.

Oh this thread started out so hopeful that I had found a good solution and clearly that's an epic fail...

[GreyhoundsRUs]

I have no pity for a baby who won't get their s* together DD tries all sorts of crap if she thinks it will work. I feel your pain - it will get easier eventually (but that eventually may not be soon).

Our nighttime routine with baby is now: feed baby while toddler plays on iPad in Mommy and Daddy's room (or she'll read). Put baby down (75% she's sleeping. If not, she's at least not hungry). Do nighttime routine with toddler. Finish with baby if needed. Take a nap

I'll be praying for you!! When does Daddy come home?


Wife of a PGY-4 Orthopod

[HouseofWool]

I have no advice, none. I am sorry this is so difficult.

[MarissaNicole]

Nah youre not traumatizing her. I go through something similar every few weeks with DD. Most nights she goes down easy and sleeps 11 hours. But once or twice a week she will either not go down or won't go back down if I try to settle her when she woke. One night it took me two hours. Half hour rocking. Half hour screaming. 20 min trying to rock while screaming. 10 minutes screaming because I needed a break. Then finally another half hour of rocking and a little screaming.

I think your good as long as she has calmed down. Its the bloody murder screaming that I just can't handle. Wears me down and tears me up inside!

I wish I had advice but I don't. Big hugs.

Wife to PGY4

[MarissaNicole]

P.s. I am hiding I'm the dark quietly because DD woke up crying but settled herself and is chattering away. But I know if she hears me she'll scream. And I don't want to start a two hour battle!

Wife to PGY4

[metroguy]

generally speaking if you can physically tired out the toddler during the day, it's much easier at night. try to take the kid out the park every day for a few hrs. it should help during the night.

[HouseofWool]

i know that it isnt possible for you to take her to the park. But, is it possible to start shortening her nap?

[SoonerTexan]

It's fine. Daddy's gone and it's hard on her, but you are doing your best. Stop beating yourself up. And for goodness sake, if it is possible get some sleep on this trip!