Toddler Struggles

[SoonerTexan]

Like kicking mommy is NEVER okay. And she doesn't get a choice on getting dressed.

The problem is they don't get it. Or don't care. People always tell me just to force her to do X. Yeah, try physically forcing a 30+ lb toddler to do anything. It doesn't work.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

The problem is they don't get it. Or don't care. People always tell me just to force her to do X. Yeah, try physically forcing a 30+ lb toddler to do anything. It doesn't work.

Yes, agreed. I think of toddlers as splitters - hedonistic terrrorists one second, angel babies the next...

[scrub-jay]

When I did that my kids flipped the lever for the drain to stop it back up again... *sigh*

Oh dd tries, but if she is caught she's out...usually kicking and screaming. Good times. Twos were a breeze, it's the 3s where I met Ms. Willful.

[ladymoreta]

Yes, agreed. I think of toddlers as splitters - hedonistic terrrorists one second, angel babies the next...

Haha so true!!!

[scrub-jay]

T&S, having daddy gone is huge here too. I think we've all had rough patches in parenting. Maybe it's developmental stage, maybe external pressure, maybe phases of the moon (lol), it just sucks. Hang in there. ((Hugs))

Mornings are finally getting better, I had to devise & explain an elaborate morning routine to dd and what she was responsible for (pick out socks, pack ice packs into lunch, turn on kitchen light, etc) and now I blame the routine, not me. It seems to have helped decrease morning conflict around here.

[scrub-jay]

I have to hide the plug (rubber stopper) so she wont put it back in. Lately she's been clever and will clog it with toys or the washcloth.

DD tries to plug it with her booty. Bats her innocent little eyes at me while contorting herself to block the drain...yea, nice try.

[scrub-jay]

The problem is they don't get it. Or don't care. People always tell me just to force her to do X. Yeah, try physically forcing a 30+ lb toddler to do anything. It doesn't work.

This. People are stupid.

[SoonerTexan]

Oh, here's another:

N cries on the way home from the sitter. She is hungry, tired, wanting out of the car, etc.

We pull into the garage and she refuses to get out of her carseat. I've gone into the house (this is lately, so it isn't dangerously hot) and come back out 5 minutes later and she is still just sitting there, not wanting to get out. STUBBORN.

[MarissaNicole]

The problem is they don't get it. Or don't care. People always tell me just to force her to do X. Yeah, try physically forcing a 30+ lb toddler to do anything. It doesn't work.

Yeah I get that. But I mean as far as verbally. I no longer ask if she wants to do x or y if it is a must. I just say. .. okay We are going to do this. .... but I can still pick her up and haven't gotten physical resistance yet.

Wife to PGY4

[SoonerTexan]

At one point I could, but not now. I'm just not strong enough.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

At one point I could, but not now. I'm just not strong enough.

Wait until you grow a belly...DD has taken to attempting to swan dive out of my arms all while balanced precariously as it is on top of her sibling in utero. I've seriously almost dropped her on the stairs a few times.

Honestly, I hope she pulls this shit for Daddy this weekend. I just want him to see what I mean because it's literally in the 3 weeks that he's been gone that this has started.

[MrsK]

For getting dressed, I made a simple chart for K1 when he was almost 2. Just a drawing of a diaper, pants, a shirt and socks. If he got off task, I'd point to the pictures and tell him he needed pants next. He'd get a sticker when we were done if he wasn't too horrible. Once he was about 2.5yo, I'd give him choices like "do you want to put on socks or your shirt first?" Or I'd let him choose which shirt. Around 2, having choices and doing things themselves are really big motivators.

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[SoonerTexan]

^^ I'll try that. Honestly, I feel skeptical, but I think she might surprise me.

[Pollyanna]

The one constant with toddlers is the more stressed you are the more they will react. The faster you try to move, the slower they will go. You will find many times that they are calmer with dad because typically dad can give them undivided attention when he is in charge and mom is usually trying to accomplish many things at once (of course this isn't always the case). No matter what is going on if you can try to take a deep breath and remain calm the toddler will do the same. After six kiddos I promise this is true.

[MrsK]

K2 (2y3m) has been driving me nuts. He's been deliberately antagonizing everyone, taunting his brother -- playing keep-away with toys, calling him a baby or, the other day, an ostrich -- He's actually reduced his brother to tears. He's also snatching our things and running with them, then throwing them clear from his body when we try to take them away. He's broken at least two glasses this way. He acts like time out is a reward, actually asking to be put in time out. He'll sit there in the corner for hours if we let him. He ignores us when we tell him no and I've had to physically restrain him at times -- which is going to be impossible to do when I'm recovering from a c-section. He weighs 35lbs so I really need him to just do and not be forced. This is the kid who has always been so easy!

Meanwhile, K1 (3y9m) has been having a lot of trouble focusing. His teacher mentioned that he tried hard but could not stay on task today. He was the classroom helper today. He was so excited about being picked but he pooped out before lunch and a couple of the older girls had to take over his duties. He's been having potty accidents - 4 this week - and he argues with me about absolutely everything. He's been back-talking and he's unable to speak at a volume any lower than ear-splitting.

And now we are moving, starting new schools, having a baby. I have to get them in line before the baby arrives. There is no way that any "helpful" grandparent is going to wrestle them into a car seat or pin them down in the time out spot.