I need some advise. K1 is 3y10m. K2 is 2y4m. (So, roughly 4yo and 2.5yo.) We moved a little less than 1 month ago. In our prior house, I had a time out spot and both boys would go to the spot when ordered to do so. I'd set a timer and they'd stay. If they refused to go to TO or refused to stay in the spot, I'd add another minute to their sentence. Usually, the threat of additional time was sufficient.
Now we are in a new house and I'm trying to establish a new TO spot. The boys are aware that I am physically incapable of lifting them and forcing them to stay in the TO spot. I can sort of lift K2 briefly; he weighs about 35lbs and he's about 1/2 my height. I cannot lift K1 at all; he weighs 40lbs and he's about 2/3rds my height.
Today, (in addition to offenses such as pulling down a rack at a clothing store), we were playing in the yard and the boys began throwing rocks. I ordered them into the house. They both ran from me, in different directions. Our yard is not fenced. I again ordered them inside and told them that there would be consequences if they did not go inside. I began a countdown. They ignored me. I picked up K2 and put him inside the house. K1 followed after K2. Once inside, I told them to go to the TO corners. They refused. I picked up K2 and put him in the gated playroom. (He considers this punishment, cried for a few minutes, and then began amusing himself with the toys). I told K1 that he'd be in TO for 4 minutes and I'd make it 5 if he did not immediately go to the TO spot. I had to repeat this threat, adding minutes, until he ended up in the corner for an 8 minute sentence. He kept sneaking out of the corner to visit with K2 through the playroom gate. After ordering him back to the TO spot repeatedly, increasing his term, etc., I finally released him after 15 minutes.
I let both boys in the playroom where they proceeded to play roughly, throw toys, etc. It was quickly getting out of hand so I offered to read to them. They seemed enthusiastic so I let them out of the playroom and told them to sit on the sofa. Both boys proceeded to run, wrestle, and kick me. I ordered K1 to go to his room and K2 to go to the corner. They refused. I finally dragged K1 to the stairs and ordered him to go to his room. He's refused and now he is sitting on the stairs wailing; there is a gate at the bottom of the stairs and he cannot get out. (Nevermind. He just got out.)
I've resorted to "Wait until your father gets home." They know that daddy can force them. I'm having similar battles over things like getting into the carseats. In the past, negotiation/reasoning/rewards/bribery/punishments worked. Physically forcing them into time out or into car seats Super Nanny style was a last resort measure.
I'm getting larger every day and in about 3 months, I'm having a c-section. I need this to stop immediately. What do I do?
Now we are in a new house and I'm trying to establish a new TO spot. The boys are aware that I am physically incapable of lifting them and forcing them to stay in the TO spot. I can sort of lift K2 briefly; he weighs about 35lbs and he's about 1/2 my height. I cannot lift K1 at all; he weighs 40lbs and he's about 2/3rds my height.
Today, (in addition to offenses such as pulling down a rack at a clothing store), we were playing in the yard and the boys began throwing rocks. I ordered them into the house. They both ran from me, in different directions. Our yard is not fenced. I again ordered them inside and told them that there would be consequences if they did not go inside. I began a countdown. They ignored me. I picked up K2 and put him inside the house. K1 followed after K2. Once inside, I told them to go to the TO corners. They refused. I picked up K2 and put him in the gated playroom. (He considers this punishment, cried for a few minutes, and then began amusing himself with the toys). I told K1 that he'd be in TO for 4 minutes and I'd make it 5 if he did not immediately go to the TO spot. I had to repeat this threat, adding minutes, until he ended up in the corner for an 8 minute sentence. He kept sneaking out of the corner to visit with K2 through the playroom gate. After ordering him back to the TO spot repeatedly, increasing his term, etc., I finally released him after 15 minutes.
I let both boys in the playroom where they proceeded to play roughly, throw toys, etc. It was quickly getting out of hand so I offered to read to them. They seemed enthusiastic so I let them out of the playroom and told them to sit on the sofa. Both boys proceeded to run, wrestle, and kick me. I ordered K1 to go to his room and K2 to go to the corner. They refused. I finally dragged K1 to the stairs and ordered him to go to his room. He's refused and now he is sitting on the stairs wailing; there is a gate at the bottom of the stairs and he cannot get out. (Nevermind. He just got out.)
I've resorted to "Wait until your father gets home." They know that daddy can force them. I'm having similar battles over things like getting into the carseats. In the past, negotiation/reasoning/rewards/bribery/punishments worked. Physically forcing them into time out or into car seats Super Nanny style was a last resort measure.
I'm getting larger every day and in about 3 months, I'm having a c-section. I need this to stop immediately. What do I do?
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