Help!

[PrincessFiona]

I would honestly just turn the boys Amish. I always found it easier to reduce the chance of my little ones getting into mischief was easier than disciplining for all of the deeds. Chairs in the room? Put them in the garage for now. Most of the toys on the floor/in the closet/toybox? Garage. I wouldn't even make it a "you will get back when you listen" thing. I honestly just had too much 'stuff' for my kiddos when they were younger and they couldn't self-regulate well. Toys would get thrown, broken, lost, etc. I finally put half of their crap away. I then traded toys out occasionally so that they had stuff that was new to them. It really worked. Frankly, MrsK, we even used double baby gates at one point by putting one gate above the next ... and we quietly joked (and were equally horrified) about the kids being in their cage. Nap time = you do not leave your room, period ... the end. You can climb the baby gate? Oh look, now there are two.


I wouldn't put K1's bed in Lammie's room right now. What will you do when the baby is there? Maybe it's time to do away with the idea of a playroom and give them each their own room. I remember when we reached that time too. It was after we had 3.

I only throw this out there because it seems like you are frustrated and are looking for solutions.

[MrsK]

I would honestly just turn the boys Amish. I always found it easier to reduce the chance of my little ones getting into mischief was easier than disciplining for all of the deeds. Chairs in the room? Put them in the garage for now. Most of the toys on the floor/in the closet/toybox? Garage. I wouldn't even make it a "you will get back when you listen" thing. I honestly just had too much 'stuff' for my kiddos when they were younger and they couldn't self-regulate well. Toys would get thrown, broken, lost, etc. I finally put half of their crap away. I then traded toys out occasionally so that they had stuff that was new to them. It really worked. Frankly, MrsK, we even used double baby gates at one point by putting one gate above the next ... and we quietly joked (and were equally horrified) about the kids being in their cage. Nap time = you do not leave your room, period ... the end. You can climb the baby gate? Oh look, now there are two.


I wouldn't put K1's bed in Lammie's room right now. What will you do when the baby is there? Maybe it's time to do away with the idea of a playroom and give them each their own room. I remember when we reached that time too. It was after we had 3.

I only throw this out there because it seems like you are frustrated and are looking for solutions.

Funny thing is that with the recent move, their toys have been reduced by 75% at least. The only "toys" in their room are lovies in their beds and library books in a small box. They have one toy (something they play together, like a LP Farm) in the den and about a dozen in the playroom. I have found that this reduction in toys is causing them to play much better with the toys. Dumping/throwing toys is no longer part of play. The amazing thing is that K1 can make *anything* into a toy. A sheet of paper, a shoelace, really, anything.

The playroom is downstairs in this house -- it's the dining room off the kitchen so it's not suitable for a bedroom. If I separate them, K1 would be sharing with Lambie once she arrives (though she'll probably be in our room most of the time anyway). Remember, we are planning to buy a house before Dec. 2014 so it wouldn't be for long.

[PrincessFiona]

The amazing thing is that K1 can make *anything* into a toy. A sheet of paper, a shoelace, really, anything.

LOL. My boys used to bite their sandwiches into guns when we wouldn't allow guns in the house as toys.

Maybe you can try doubling the babygates to keep them in their room.

I'm not sure I would switch K1 to the baby's room.

I forgot that you guys are moving again soon. At least now you have some better ideas of the house you will need! 3 bedrooms for kids plus maybe a playroom? I'm excited. Now I want to start looking at houses for you!!!

[Phoebe]

Your boys honestly sound like my girls who are 7 and 10. My kids aren't even toddlers so I have no excuse on their lack of impulse control. They are freaking exhausting. The 10 year old is constantly antagonizing the other girls. They run around in circles in the house and wrestle in their bedrooms whenever they have a task. I have lost it today with DH being on call. I can no longer take it. They share a room. I have gone round and round in my head about separating them. At their age, they should be able to freaking comply and go to bed. However, everyday is a nightmare. I would separate them in a heartbeat. Our new house has a bedroom for everyone. I would try separating your boys and see how it works if I were you. As far as toys, we always rotated toys and the kids played with them a lot more often.

[Pollyanna]

I agree with Kris about sharing a room with baby. I just wouldn't feel comfortable with an active preschooler sharing with a newborn. I'd probably just separate the boys and keep baby in your room until you buy a house. We did that when our second arrived and we lived in a two bedroom. We just bought a partition and created a nursery in the corner of the master. It was tight but it worked until we moved when he was 17 months.

[MrsK]

I forgot that you guys are moving again soon. At least now you have some better ideas of the house you will need! 3 bedrooms for kids plus maybe a playroom? I'm excited. Now I want to start looking at houses for you!!!

Yeah, well once they are out of toddler beds they'll probably need their own rooms anyway. . . guess their clothes will be too big to fit in three little drawers then too and they'll need more than one pair of shoes each. $$$ I'd be excited about house shopping too if it wasn't for the whole first-year-out-of-training-paycheck-deduction-shock thing. I'm sure that the picture will look a lot different a year from now, once we are settled in the job (hopefully), Lambie is here (gd willing), and the boys are a little older. Ugh, it's all so complicated!

[MrsK]

I agree with Kris about sharing a room with baby. I just wouldn't feel comfortable with an active preschooler sharing with a newborn. I'd probably just separate the boys and keep baby in your room until you buy a house. We did that when our second arrived and we lived in a two bedroom. We just bought a partition and created a nursery in the corner of the master. It was tight but it worked until we moved when he was 17 months.

We'll see. Tonight, the boys were being horrible through the bath/bed routine. I brought K1 into Lambie's now empty room, showed him the pink floral wallpaper (there when we moved in), and pointed out that it wasn't as nice as his room with the cool night light, dinosaurs, pictures on the walls, etc. I told him that if he did not listen and promptly go to bed without trashing his room or making mischief with his brother, I'd drag his mattress into Lambie's pink, girly, baby room and make him sleep in there. I think he got the picture.

When K2 was born, he ended up sleeping in our room until he was about 6mo; I'm assuming that Lambie will do the same. Then he moved into K1's room. K1 was 24mo at the time. They did okay. The reason I'm thinking of putting K1 with the baby instead of K2 is that by the time Lambie is 6mo, K1 will be almost 5yo and because K1 is actually excited about the baby. He knows to be gentle with her and I don't think he'd mess with her, especially down the road when he's 8 or 9 months older than he is now. K2 on the other hand, will be just turning 3yo when she is about 6mo and he is already kind of bitter about her pending arrival. I'd actually be worried that he could hurt her. I definitely wouldn't have either of the boys room with Lambie or even be alone with her at all when she's newborn.

[Phoebe]

I agree that I would not put a preschooler in with a baby to share a room. however in the meantime may give you some relief.

[MrsK]

During naptime today, K1 left his bedroom after I expressly told him the batman books he checked out today would be returned to the libary if he did so. Then he went into the (locked) office, opened a birthday present for a classmate of his who is having a party this weekend, scattered the contents throughout the room and destroying the gift beyond repair in the process. He also rummaged through our things and scattered office supplies around the room. Just this morning, he was in time out for going into the locked office. (I wish I knew how he's getting in there.)

I have informed him that as his punishment (1) he had to pick up everything he scattered around the office, (2) the batman books are going back to the library, and (3) he cannot attend the party this weekend since he destroyed his friend's gift. I just had the embarrassing experience of calling the birthday boy's mom to cancel without stating a reason. I just couldn't tell her that he was being punished after he made a big scene shoving a kid at the last class birthday party. We're new there and I just don't want the other moms thinking that he's a bad kid. But I feel like I need to stand my ground. He needs to get that his choices have consequences.

I hate being mean mommy.

[Pollyanna]

I hate being mean mommy.

Not mean mommy, loving mommy raising him to be a good man, husband, father and friend.

I want to know how he gets in the study too!!! You might need to set up a video camera, lol

[MrsK]

*sigh* I really felt awful driving him to the library and putting the books in the drop. I felt like I'd lose my resolve if I didn't do it right away. At dinner, he was telling me that when he was in the office he glued something to the wall. I'm going to have to investigate this. . . and install surveillance cameras.

[Sheherezade]

I haven't been following all the exploits of The K brothers but is K1 maybe too old for his nap? I know you mentioned he'd be 5 when you considered rooming him with the new baby. Is he 4 now?

[MrsK]

He'll be 4 in December. He naps most days, falling asleep on his own after lunch. There seems to be a very pronounced decline in his ability to focus and follow directions just before naptime. Today, he fell asleep moments after I caught him in the office.

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk 2

[Sheherezade]

Ah. I thought he might just be up to mischief while his brother slept and he was at loose ends. Mine gave up regular naps around 3-4 so it seemed possible.