Kindergarten During 4th Year?

[seaside*bliss]

If you moved around a lot during 4th year for your DH's rotations, what did you do for your school aged children? Nick will be 5 next summer, will I have to homeschool him?

[MarissaNicole]

Sorry I can't give advice because I don't have any little blessings, but I do know that I am staying home during my husbands three (4 week) rotations because I've got to work to pay the bills. But I am hoping to go on a few interviews (even if I don't get to see the schools I will like to visit the potential cities we may be moving to)

I know you've told us before but do you work or go to school or stay home with your little one(s)?

[HouseofWool]

Honestly? I would stay put and send the little one to kindergarden. However, if your little guy is young for his age, you could just hold him back for a year so that he is 6 when he starts school. I know several boys who are the oldest in their class for that very reason.

DH is just starting his PGY1 and plans on doing a fellowship (oh joy). He doesn't yet realize that I anticipate not moving the kids for just one year. I don't think that is fair to them.

[MrsK]

Come to think of it, we'll be doing the same thing. Baby K should be about 4 when DrK finishes his residency. . . Oy, here I was thinking that we'd be leaving Wichita before the kids started school.

[Pollyanna]

Honestly? I would stay put and send the little one to kindergarden.

Yep. I don't know anyone that moved around with their hubby during PGY4, they do their away rotations and then come back home in between.

I also agree on waiting. Boy, summer birthday = hold off school for one more year (IMHO). Boys already start off school about 6 months behind the girls then add a summer birthday and he will be more than a year behind some of the kids. If not academically at the very least socially. Give him the gift of a year. While it may not make a difference now it will be huge when he is a teen. There is no rush, he will be in school a long time.

[madeintaiwan]

DH is just starting his PGY1 and plans on doing a fellowship (oh joy). He doesn't yet realize that I anticipate not moving the kids for just one year. I don't think that is fair to them.

This was my original plan, but our 8 year old caught wind of it and wasn't too happy about it. He told us that he didn't want to be away from daddy for an entire year. Fellowship is still 3 years out, so we'll have to wait and see where the fellowship is. DS1 will be in 6th grade for fellowship year.

[madeintaiwan]

To the OP, I would not recommend purposely moving a child from school to school for short periods of time. I went to 3 schools in the 1st grade [my dad was military and we got restationed and then my parents divorced that year]. It was a huge pain, lots of stress, and a big adjustment each time. There have been a few kids that have come and gone during J's last school year and it really affected the other kids too. Not academically but socially and emotionally. I would either stay put, homeschool, or hold him back. I know in CA, children are not required to attend school until the age of 6.

[houseelf]

Honestly? I would stay put and send the little one to kindergarden. However, if your little guy is young for his age, you could just hold him back for a year so that he is 6 when he starts school. I know several boys who are the oldest in their class for that very reason.

ITA. When I observed my DS's third grade class, you could almost sort out the kids by their birthdays. Both of my summer babies will be held back. I'd rather them be the oldest than the youngest, ESPECIALLY when we're talking about boys and their maturity levels.

Kelly

[peggyfromwastate]

I'm guessing your SO will rotate at a lot of military bases- I'm not sure about enrolling and re-enrolling for 4 month stints in DOD schools. When DH did his away rotations on MS4, he was only funded for 1 away rotation, I think. He might have been funded for only 10 days of that one, plus airfare.

Anyway, I vote for either staying put and letting your son go through KG where you live, or holding him back for a year if you want to go to visit your SO.

[MrsK]

Oh! I hadn't realized you were talking about moving around with him during rotations! (I'm spacey these days). Definitely stay put. During some of his M4 rotations, DrK was living in studios, hotels, trailers, jails, mental hospitals. . . not family friendly. I wasn't even able to visit him at the jail. He drove home every weekend -- 8 hours each way.

Question: I may be confusing you with someone else but didn't you say that the child is your SO's son from a prior marriage? Does he have primary custody?

[seaside*bliss]

Oh! I hadn't realized you were talking about moving around with him during rotations! (I'm spacey these days). Definitely stay put. During some of his M4 rotations, DrK was living in studios, hotels, trailers, jails, mental hospitals. . . not family friendly. I wasn't even able to visit him at the jail. He drove home every weekend -- 8 hours each way.

Question: I may be confusing you with someone else but didn't you say that the child is your SO's son from a prior marriage? Does he have primary custody?

Ya that's the issue. He is working on getting full custody right now.

[Rapunzel]

If you're planning on moving around from place to place during rotations I'd definitely homeschool. It's the only way to really give a child stability and continuity in their education if you are moving so much (I know this because we just completed cross country move #3 last summer - and those three moves spanned only two years).

Otherwise (if you plan to enroll the child in school) I'd say stay put and accept a few weeks or months of separation during the away rotations.

And, I definitely concur that if you have a boy with a summer birthday and have the option it definitely seems to work very well to hold him back from school for a year.

[PrincessFiona]

I don't know anyone who followed their SO on their rotations, tbh. Most moms or spouses stay put and keep their kids in school or work. They see each other as a couple either on weekends off or after the rotation is over.

The only way you could do this, really, would be to homeschool. Anything else would be too hard on the child, I think.

Kris

[Meenah]

I may have missed it if you posted somewhere else, but are you planning on getting married? Some Judges may favor the fact that you are married and not living together when they consider family stability, etc. Of course this is no reason to get married unless you are planning on it anyway. The ex could try to use you two living together against him. Just a thought, and I could be very wrong.

[Rapunzel]

During residency the kids and I did accompany dh on one six-week rotation that was far away from the program. We really had a blast (the kids and I - dh workedcthe entire time). We homeschooled, though. I would definitely NOT uproot the kids like that otherwise.