New Daddy books

[Thirteen]

If you're hoping for something to teach him to be more sympathetic and compassionate, the baby will probably be the most efficient thing.
Getting him to read a book could be challenging, but placing a newborn in his arms and telling him that he is the dad, and needs to get on board with helping you and catering to your and the baby's needs is a crash course in both sympathy and compassion.
(Just in case he balks at reading...)

[GreyhoundsRUs]

I haven't looked into it for financial reasons, and because I would actually rather have my mother or a close friend there. Major tangent, but my mom doesn't want to be there because she thinks its a bonding time between DH and I. I think I need to sit down with DH and discuss. Part of me thinks he COULD be amazing if it is just him, but a small part of me worries that he won't be compassionate enough and/or will be delayed because of work, and I don't want to have any regrets.

This is obviously a very personal choice, but I loved having just DH and I. My DH is much like yours - but 13 is 100% right! As far as L&D go, your DH has probably never had to sit with you while you are in pain, struggling, uncomfortable, emotional, and otherwise a wreck (just being honest). He will hopefully step up to the plate because he is a "fixer" - he'll want to help make his wife feel better The only thing I would suggest is maybe coming up with a list of things that will help you relax during labor (both passive and active).

ETA - talk to him about work now and make sure everyone is on the same page. Are you delivering at his hospital? If you normally page him throughout the day, have a special code so he knows your in labor and not just needing some salad from the store

[Bittersweet]

Can you have a support person on call and ready to.come at a moments notice? I love him dearly but my Dh was not the best labor support. He was far too calm and slow moving and just generally annoyed the shit out of me (totally unexpected BTW). I thought and planned on having just DH and I present .... but man am I glad my sister was there. It's always nice to have a backup plan, ya know.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

I haven't looked into it for financial reasons, and because I would actually rather have my mother or a close friend there. Major tangent, but my mom doesn't want to be there because she thinks its a bonding time between DH and I. I think I need to sit down with DH and discuss. Part of me thinks he COULD be amazing if it is just him, but a small part of me worries that he won't be compassionate enough and/or will be delayed because of work, and I don't want to have any regrets.

Our is $600. I know that's not CHEAP by any stretch but I justified it as $15/week of pregnancy. We're finding savings in other places (i.e. we're not doing a crib but baby will sleep in a pack and play, we're using a craigslist dresser that was $10 instead of a baby one, etc.). It will be just DH and I (besides the doula) and that's how I want it but he's definitely relieved that there will be someone else there who's 1) actually had a baby and 2) has been a labor support for hundreds of births. Even the best husband will never see as many births as a doula.

[MarissaNicole]

If you're hoping for something to teach him to be more sympathetic and compassionate, the baby will probably be the most efficient thing.
Getting him to read a book could be challenging, but placing a newborn in his arms and telling him that he is the dad, and needs to get on board with helping you and catering to your and the baby's needs is a crash course in both sympathy and compassion.
(Just in case he balks at reading...)

DH is so understanding and helpful when it comes to anything except for physical pain. I have no worries he will do as much as he can when baby is born. He has been asking for a baby for years, and often thanks me for "growing him a baby." (Each night after his long days he helps around the house, and asks if its okay if he reads before heading to bed). And he is wonderful with all my nephews/niece, feeds, burbs, changes diapers, etc. So I am not so worried about his compassion for me taking care of the baby, that I think he he'll be fine with. I just think he doesn't know how to deal with people in pain, or things that are "routine." As most of you can relate, they have to take some of the emotion out of work because they deal with so much tradjedy.

I also think he is very concerned about being a good dad, and being supportive of me, so I do think he will read something if I give it to him. HE was the one who asked about "new daddy books."

I'm thinking that I will read the birth partner, and have him read portions, then we can discuss what we will do. We have three months to form a plan, but I think it may also be a good idea to have my mom and a close friend "on-call" like Bittersweet suggested.

[ladymoreta]

I forgot about it, but his cousin gave DH "The Expectant Father". I don't know if he read it or if it was good, but it's one written for dads. http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/078920...6915621&sr=8-3


Laurie

[scarlett09]

I don't have any horses in this race, but I did find a book that the AAP will be putting out in June. It sounds good, might have to get it for DH: http://www.amazon.com/Dad-Parenting-...ecc_rvi_cart_1.

Obviously, you will need the book before June, and the AAP currently has it in their bookstore: https://www.nfaap.org/netforum/eweb/...e-fca320b787c7.

[MarissaNicole]

So DH asked me to look into getting the birth partner digitally (so he can read it on his IPOD) and when I searched the nook bookstore for "birth partner" this is what came up (do not open around children).

[GreyhoundsRUs]

So DH asked me to look into getting the birth partner digitally (so he can read it on his IPOD) and when I searched the nook bookstore for "birth partner" this is what came up (do not open around children).

A "surprise" for sure! Yikes!

[scrub-jay]

That is hysterical!!

[SuzySunshine]

Holy crap!

[Thirteen]

H'oooooookay. Wow! I laughed hard.


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[SoonerTexan]

Well one does lead to the other. In theory.

[scarlett09]

Whoa B&N!! That is an interesting mix of selections on one page!