Medical profession jokes! LOL

[Momo]

These were forwarded to DH.
I bet these are probably old or may have appeared on here at one time or another, but they made me chuckle so I thought I'd share! Feel free to add ones you have heard ...it would be fun to build a list of medical profession jokes!



How do you hide $5.00 from a surgeon? put it in a journal

How do you hide $5.00 from a radiologist? put it on the patient

How do you hide $5.00 from a plastic surgeon? you can't!

[corn poffi]

Our friend (ortho PGY2) told us this one yesterday...

When holding the doors open on an elevator, one should use the least used body part in case the door should malfunction:
Internists should use their hand.
Surgeons should use their foot.
Orthopods should use their head.

[v-girl]

Lol

[L.Jane]

Oh yeah J has a buttload of those hide a dollar jokes. One for pretty much every area of medicine. The neurosurgeon one is the worst... give it to their kids.

How do you hide a $100 from an internist?
Put it under a dressing.

[Momo]

Ljane please ask him if he has one for cards??

[Vanquisher]

Definition of a double-blind study?

Two orthopods trying to read an EKG.

[Momo]

keep 'em coming...maybe we can publish an iMSN book of jokes someday if we get enough!

[weeniegeniewife]

These are hysterical. DH has a bunch for uro; I'll get them from him when he comes home tonight.

[diggitydot]

Oh, holy shit. I love you guys. This thread is my new official favorite.

[HouseofWool]

Definition of a double-blind study?

Two orthopods trying to read an EKG.

OMFG Heidi - that is hysterical!

[Auspicious]

The classic duck-hunting joke:

Ok, so an internist, a surgeon, and a pathologist go duck hunting. The internist is up first and takes aim. A duck flies by and the internist looks up and thinks "hmm... could be a goose, gander, duck? how about swan? eagle, hawk? no not likely but still possible. what about other waterfowl? hmm..." and the duck flies on out of range. The surgeon is up next and takes aim. Before the bird is even clearly in sight... BANG! In the distance something falls from the sky. The surgeon turns to the pathologist and says "Go tell me what that is".

Several variations out there, but always ends with the surgeon and the pathologist.

[GrayMatterWife]

Definition of a double-blind study?

Two orthopods trying to read an EKG.

OMWORD! I just about spit out my Coke laughing at that one!

[ladymoreta]

I asked DH what his favorite anesthesia joke was, and he said the ABCs of anesthesia: Airway, Book, Chair.

Then when I gave him a blank stare, he explained. (Based on the ABCs of CPR - Airway, Breathing, Circulation. But anesthesiologists do the airway, grab their book, and sit in the chair.)

[niener]

Lol LM!

I'll have to ask DH if he has any good ones when he gets home.

Also I feel many of these are funny because they're true...

[Momo]

Ljane & WGW...waiting.on your additions!!!! like I said keep 'em coming!