How to join private group?

My gripe is things like going to a new hair salon where they chat with you and ask what your husband does. I usually say he works at XX hospital but sometimes the 'truth' comes out that he is a doctor. I want to say, you know he basically earns minimum wage if you calculate his hours worked. I try to be very frugal but I think when people hear he is a doctor they assume we can afford more.

[L.Jane]

My gripe is things like going to a new hair salon where they chat with you and ask what your husband does. I usually say he works at XX hospital but sometimes the 'truth' comes out that he is a doctor. I want to say, you know he basically earns minimum wage if you calculate his hours worked. I try to be very frugal but I think when people hear he is a doctor they assume we can afford more.

YES! J and I were doing the calculations and it seriously is min wage if you count the hours. I was babysitting one week, and he goes, "You know, you are making more then me this week. If I ever get hired this or next school year, I will be making the same amount as him for less hours.

HI all My DF is a PGY2 of Psychiatry!

[OrionGrad]

This site is great. I can't tell you how many times I want to roll my eyes when I hear "oh, well you should be able to get through this because in two years you will be rich." OK, well - for the past 6 1/2 years we've been POOR and that doesn't make it any easier to ride through this stuff. YUCK!

Couldn't agree more. The idea that my husband will be earning a paycheck at this time next year still seems strange to me (he's an MS4 and we've been together through years of schooling at this point)--but the idea that he'll someday be earning "big bucks" is definitely way too far off to even comprehend.
Just trying to take it one day (or one paycheck) at a time.

i have more than 50 posts but my post count only says 30

[PrincessFiona]

Re: How to join private group?

This is def a tapatalk issue. Thanx for the head's up. I'll email the tapatalk people.

Kris


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

if it only takes 50 posts to get into the private areas... why do they say it takes 100?

Marriage Matters
Private discussion forum for issues relating to relationships. Membership requires a minimum of 100 posts.

[Sheherezade]

Sorry - the 50 post business was from a few years ago. We've decided that 100 posts makes more sense these days. Our younger members rack up the posts a lot more quickly than the older members. We had originally formulated the 50 post/1 mos membership as a "probationary - getting to know you" period but lately 50 posts has meant 1 week/lots of one line posts. We decided that increasing the post count to 100 and specifying that administration would personally make the call on each new members access would be the best solution. Sometimes, people have a pressing need to get in to a private forum space. Sometimes, the administrators and members don't really "know" a new member even after 50 posts. I think that Facebook/Twitter has created a generation of much more prolific posters! That said, today's posts tend to be Facebook status short- not paragraph long like this one. Things have changed here.... and we are changing our standards to accomodate. Each members admission will be decided individually. It's a judgment call.

We do not use an automated promotion system. Each new member must have their access and permissions set by an administrator. New members are permitted in to the forums that correspond to their stage of the training process. After you have been around for awhile and posted the required number of times, you must message an administrator to apply for appropriate private forum access.

hows it that the 50 rule is YEARS ago... yet this thread was made a couple of months ago? theres numerous threads about the post limit being 50 posts and not 100 since ive been a member...

so now i have to ask since you say "administration would personally make the call on each new members access would be the best solution." does that mean that even after 100 posts i (someone) still wouldnt be allowed into the other sections? whats the point of having a post count if its still up to the admin weither or not to let the "newbie" in or not?

[Sheherezade]

The 50 post thing was text moved over from the forum when we changed the software to VBulletin. When I say "years ago" I mean that it was a rule set up at the inception of this site...15 years ago. At the time, it was sufficient. Now, we believe that times have changed.

We have always made the call on admission manually. When someone PMs us for admission, we discuss it in email and make a call. *shrug* The "50 post requirement" hadn't been edited even though we made the decision to move to 100 some time around the start of this thread. As you can see when you read through this particular thread, this issue has been under discussion for some time.

We edited the text at the top of the private forums a few nights ago. The delay was because we are all volunteers, parents and some of us work all day as well. We don't have editing an online BB page at the top of the priority list. None the less, that has been our decision for some time now.

Yes...we can decide to not let someone in. We would discuss that with them in PMs. We can also decide to let someone in that had less than 100 posts if they have presented a good reason and they have been around a longer time with fewer posts. Some people are just shy. I have been on this site for over ten years now...and I still have a pitiful number of posts compared to others. Maybe it is because I post these NOVEL like posts and don't post one liners. Who knows? People are different. That's a good thing.

We need to judge each case individually. We can only do that when we feel we KNOW the individual. It is tricky on the internet - but the administrators have been doing this for 10-15 years now. We do our best to judge carefully and fairly for all the members (old and new) on the site. We have also *rarely* ejected members that have become dangerous to others. We do our best to create a supportive but challenging community. Still, we are only human. Since the posting patterns have changed so much in the last year, we will make an effort to have our younger mods make the call on new members along with us now so that we can have a younger generation perspective. That's the best we can do, I guess.

[PrincessFiona]

Re: How to join private group?

We had to post this thread after switching from phpBB to vBulletin. We had some confusion and new members were given call room access. We have added layers of access since then for the protection and privacy of our members. 50 posts is not what it once was. In earlier times, we had the opportunity to get to trust someone over time. The newest twitter generation is managing 50 posts in a day or two. LOL

It is for the protection of your privacy as much as someone elses!

Kris


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

We had to post this thread after switching from phpBB to vBulletin. We had some confusion and new members were given call room access. We have added layers of access since then for the protection and privacy of our members. 50 posts is not what it once was. In earlier times, we had the opportunity to get to trust someone over time. The newest twitter generation is managing 50 posts in a day or two. LOL

It is for the protection of your privacy as much as someone elses!

Kris


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

im finding that hard to believe, theres not that many "active" topics on here for that to happen. i could see if there was a plethora of new threads to post in, but thats not the case. then again ive noticed that the site is mostly made up of women, so i guess i can see how one could get 50 posts per day being a woman. theres plenty of shopping and recipe threads... and it would be just my luck that i only know how to make PB&J's LOL

[PrincessFiona]

LOL Just look at how many posts you have made today....and me....they add up quickly!

Kris

[OrionGrad]

I just realized I've gone over the 50 posts (woohoo!) but I still haven't gotten access to the private groups. Is there something else I need to do?
Thanks!

Private forum access requires a minimum of 100 posts.