Hello!

Thank You everyone!

Thank you so much for all the warm welcomes. This website, along with valuemd are hard to navigate. Where do people start talking? Are there blogs? Or do we just post threads and hope that people say something on them? How do we find other people's threads?

Now on the real questions... I have read that many studentmd wives are staying at home. How do you afford this? Do you live on the student loans? I'm very interested in seeing how some of you made it work? I would love to join my husband and not spend 16 months away but with my student loans and general living expenses for our family, I just can't see how I can make that work. We also own a home that is now worth $60K less than what we OWE... yep, not even what we paid for, what we owe still. We are going to be renting to help but will still be losing a lot of money each moth doing it. My son and I are going to move in with my in laws. We will be moving mid Feb and will all live together for a few months until my husband departs for the island.

I got really depressed reading medical spouse blogs yesterday. Some of them make it sounds like its never going to get any better... even after training!!! I'm worried that my son is going to feel like he doesn't have a father!!

For those of you that have children that went through the training process, do you feel like they will be affected by not getting enough attention from daddy?

Lacy

marissa nicole...it's a caribbean school

we survived ross. we had a 2 month old when we left for the island, and came home with a 1.5 year old and 6 month old. as hard as it's going to be, alone...here in the states (or canada?) it's not easy there...as a family.

encourage your SO to push all the way through. it's doable..but hard. the way ross works is, 4 months on, two weeks off. dh finished in 37 (ish) months. and pushed through without any vacations durning rotations as well. so, when residency is over (in 6 months 6 months 6 months 6 months) we got it all done in 7 years, 2 months. suck, yup. worth it...i'll let you know in 6 months.

welcome! post often. and make sure you get an internet telephone. you'll want that connection!

Rainbabies!! OH MY! You went to the island with a two month old and had another baby while you were there? How did you manage? I would have gone crazy! Did your husband have any trouble with residency match? Did he have any trouble with clinicals? Did he get to stay in one area for clinicals? We live in Michigan and they're telling us that he can do 5th semester in Saginaw and all his clinicals in SE Michigan as well. I'm sure if they're really telling the truth. I've read some scary things about having to wait and wait and wait to get into your next clinical rotation. He's not a traditional student. We're not 22 years old! We want this to be over quickly so that we can move on with our lives... and more importantly, move out of my in laws!

Residency Income

I know its quite rude to ask about income... but frankly, I need to know for budget purposes. What kind of income can we expect during residency? I know its not going to be as much as he makes now. But I'm trying to figure out if we can at least move back into our home. I also realize that the specialty of residency makes a big difference in pay. So, if you don't mind can you tell me that too?

[poky]

Hi, Lacy, and welcome!

Most residency programs advertise their salaries. Here's a summary I found that has some averages, and also answers some other questions:

http://mdsalaries.blogspot.com/2005/...-salaries.html

What I saw seems pretty accurate. Doesn't really depend on specialty, but rather institution and location and what year you're in.

[NYCHoosier]

I know its quite rude to ask about income... but frankly, I need to know for budget purposes. What kind of income can we expect during residency? I know its not going to be as much as he makes now. But I'm trying to figure out if we can at least move back into our home. I also realize that the specialty of residency makes a big difference in pay. So, if you don't mind can you tell me that too?

Residency salaries vary based on location, program, and specialty. If you know more or less which specialty he'd like to end up in, you can get an idea by looking on Freida:
https://freida.ama-assn.org/Freida/u...ogramSearch.do

Not all programs have a full profile, but most do, including the salary at each level of residency.

For orthopedic surgery, I've found most in the $40k - $60k range, with the higher salaries usually in NYC where taxes and expenses are high. The monthly take-home after taxes basically ranges from $2500 - $3500 (again for ortho). A lot of times I've found that more prestigious programs tend to offer lower salaries because they can. That said, the variance isn't all that much at the residency level.

Anyway, welcome!! It's a long road, but that's life, right? Congrats to your husband!

ETA: Sorry to negate poky. She's right - in residency the pay difference isn't that big. Still, it seems that there is still a gap in salary between say, Plastics and Pediatrics. The differences in resident salaries are nothing compared to the gaps you currently see in attending salaries. But, who knows what will happen there in the next few years.

[poky]

ETA: Sorry to negate poky. She's right - in residency the pay difference isn't that big. Still, it seems that there is still a gap in salary between say, Plastics and Pediatrics. The differences in resident salaries are nothing compared to the gaps you currently see in attending salaries. But, who knows what will happen there in the next few years.

No problem. I think the page I linked to said that within a single institution, generally, the salaries will be the same for all residents, regardless of specialty, which *may* be true...but in looking at CWRU/UH residency program pages, Anesthesiology, Peds, and Family med all pay slightly differently; all in the mid $40Ks for PGY1, but all different. So that page isn't completely correct, and it can vary by specialty, but not enough in residency to really matter all that much.

[Thirteen]

Lacy,
We currently live with my in-laws, have since our marriage in June of this year, and will until Summer 2011. If you ever want to vent/talk about it, you can always PM me I get it!



As far as income is concerned, it also largely reflects on the cost of living, and taxes withheld. For example, my DH is supposed to have $40k, and gets a small raise for his final resident year. However, he brings home around 2,000 - 2,200 a month after taxes, and we live in CA, so it doesn't go very far.

[v-girl]

Welcome to the board!

I worked through med school to support our family (we had the first kid right as he started the MSTP at UT Southwestern, her sister was born 18 months later and their brother came 7 years after that -- just before graduation). Hubby graduation and started residency in June 2007. I quit my job that October. Finances are the least of my worries right now as I am homeschooling our daughters, chasing a rambunctious toddler boy and getting by on Diet Coke, wine and lots of prayers. I know there are families who go through med school with no one working a full time job, but the only way we could have done that would have been loans and we weren't willing to take out any loans (other than our small house and cars -- no car payments right now).

[scrub-jay]

Welcome to the board!

I worked through med school to support our family (we had the first kid right as he started the MSTP at UT Southwestern, her sister was born 18 months later and their brother came 7 years after that -- just before graduation). Hubby graduation and started residency in June 2007. I quit my job that October. Finances are the least of my worries right now as I am homeschooling our daughters, chasing a rambunctious toddler boy and getting by on Diet Coke, wine and lots of prayers. I know there are families who go through med school with no one working a full time job, but the only way we could have done that would have been loans and we weren't willing to take out any loans (other than our small house and cars -- no car payments right now).

Just a quick note (sorry for the hijack) - Your story really does inspire me as I am facing working through med school to support us - while having our kiddo. Thanks!

Hello Ladies,

My husband and I are about to start this crazy journey that you are all going through. He will be starting school at Ross University in May 2010. Our two year old son and I will not be joining him. I'm really going to need all the support and advice I can get from other wives/mothers going through this. I work full time as an engineer. My husband is currently an engineer as well. Are any of you spouses of doctors that go/went to Ross?

Lacy

Hi Lacy! It's really great that you've found this place so early on. You will need all of the support you can get. Trust me!

So, I am wife to MS2 @ St. George's in Grenada, West Indies. We are finally leaving the island in a few days and will be starting clinicals this coming summer in NYC.

I decided to stay behind and live at home to work and do my masters. It was very very hard to do. After a few months, I became very irritated by being "held down" and unable to see him when I wanted to. So, we came up with something that worked for us. I put school on hold and kept my job with his family as long as they would work with me (of course they do). We have succeeded by my flying back and forth every other month or so and staying for a month to 6 weeks at a time. And, when I am home, Skype has been a life saver. Sometimes, he will just keep his camera on even if he's studying just so that I can see him. Knowing that I can get in touch with him whenever needed is very important. If I was not able to have a job that was able to work with that, then my only solution would have been to move with him to the island for good.

There are people that move their whole families to this island. They live off of loans. DH and I only take out enough $ for tuition and living expense for him. But, some families take out the spouse and children stipends also. Not every family is the same, so you have to find what works for you.

Your relationship will definitely be tested...especially with a child. But, if you can be strong willed and are understanding...it can definitely work. I have a close friend from the UK that is here and his wife and 2 children are back in the UK. She has not been able to come visit at all while he's been in school. I know that she hates it, but they have great communication and they make it work.

In my opinion, being the wife/SO of a med student/doctor is not easy and it never will be. You will always have to work with his schedule and compromise. But, it takes two...You have to be understanding of how hectic and hard everything is for him while he learns to balance spending time talking with you and studying/working.

Thanks Ladies!

I appreciate all the information. The residency salary information was very helpful and the stories of your situations are encouraging! Peeps, your friend in the UK makes me feel like this is possible! hahaha

Do any of your husbands have the federal loans? I read on a different thread that they no longer allow you to defer them during residency. I'm curious as to how much the payments will be, since I read that it is income based. We will probalby need a $220K loan. The thing is, my husband already HAS a ton of student loans that will also need to be repaid then. Do they take other student loan payments into consideration? Its sounding more and more like I'm going to be stuck living with my in laws for more than four years. (

[poky]

My understanding is that you can still get deferral, just not forbearance (or maybe it's the other way around?) - you still don't have to pay it down, but they no long allow you to not rack up interest while you don't pay, it just keeps accumulating. Of course, it'll still be accumulating even if you're paying it off, but presumably it'd be a little less. What they got rid of recently was the ability to freeze it with no payback and no interest accruing until residency is over.

[NYCHoosier]

My understanding is that you can still get deferral, just not forbearance (or maybe it's the other way around?) - you still don't have to pay it down, but they no long allow you to not rack up interest while you don't pay, it just keeps accumulating. Of course, it'll still be accumulating even if you're paying it off, but presumably it'd be a little less. What they got rid of recently was the ability to freeze it with no payback and no interest accruing until residency is over.

There's also income-based repayment which determines how much you should be expect to pay based on your household income. If you make your payments on time for 25 years, the rest of the loan is forgiven.

[MarissaNicole]

There's also income-based repayment which determines how much you should be expect to pay based on your household income. If you make your payments on time for 25 years, the rest of the loan is forgiven.

Income based repayment caps your repayment at 15% of your salary. The benefit of this allows you pay during residency but it limits what your payments are. Also if 15% is still less than the interest acquiring, then the govt pays the difference. While it makes your payments smaller during residency it can also make your payments larger post residency.

My husband and I are planning to defer through residency. While the interest will still accumulate we CAN still make payments IF we choose without being penalized. We therefore plan to pay what we can and hopefully pay off as much interest as possible during that time, but if we have unexpected expenses we will not be required to pay anything.

I know it is easier said than done, but try and not worry too much about loan repayment right now.

And my best advice for you is expect the worst and hope for the best!

Hi! I'm New!

Hello All -

I think I'm in a little bit different position than most in that I'm not married (dating my dear boyfriend who is an internist for a year) and he's been out of medical school for years. For the ladies whose husbands are in residendency it sounds very difficult! My heart goes out to you. Maybe I shouldn't complain so much!!! LOL... however, I'm here for the same reason as the rest of you just to give/get support from others in a similar situation.

Hmm... what else? My boyfriend is great but his schedule has been causing conflicts lately. I think after a year it just dawned on me that it doesn't get better! He works M-F and is on call Monday nights and Wednesday nights. Tuesdays he is so tired! Lately we started doing a date night and that seems to help. I think I'm just really starting to think about what life would be like with this schedule and even bringing children into the mix! It is a bit scary.

Well Happy Holidays!

tivona80