Announcement

Collapse

Facebook Forum Migration

Our forums have migrated to Facebook. If you are already an iMSN forum member you will be grandfathered in.

To access the Call Room and Marriage Matters, head to: https://m.facebook.com/groups/400932...eferrer=search

You can find the health and fitness forums here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/133538...eferrer=search

Private parenting discussions are here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/382903...eferrer=search

We look forward to seeing you on Facebook!
See more
See less

Glad I am not alone!

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Glad I am not alone!

    Hi! I am new to IMSN. A little background . . . I went to law school in California and graduated in 2005. I moved back to my home state - Alabama - and practiced law there until June 2010. I also met my husband in Alabama, and we were married in 2009. Ironically, he was accepted to a medical school in California, so I'm back on the West Coast again.

    It has only been one week since his classes started, but I can already identify with so many of the posts. I am unemployed at the moment, and although I do have some law school friends scattered about, they live in different cities and are pretty busy with their own families. I am trying not to sit at home having a pity party - I have joined a gym, looked for volunteer opportunities, searched for jobs, explored my local town, and, like another poster, dabbled on Craigslist. I used to be fun, involved, and interesting in my former life. Now, I'm feeling a bit lost, crazy, sad, frustrated, vulnerable, stupid (did I just give up my career?), worried (about the future), and confused (what happened to the spouse I knew?). And it is only the first week!

    At the same time, I want to be supportive of my spouse because I know he is stressed too. I also knew this is what he wanted to do when we got married and gave him my full support. In other words, I signed up for this.

    I now realize the issues popping up now are ones we are going to have to manage/deal with for the next few years, and possibly the rest of our lives. So, I really appreciate others sharing their experiences and giving advice on how to manage/find time with your spouses as I do not know anyone else in a similar situation. This forum may just save me.

    P.S. I don't want to come across as being negative. I just did not know what to expect, and this week has been challenging. I am encouraged that so many of you have been through this and survived!

  • #2
    Welcome! You have been through a lot of changes lately! There are quite a few lawyers on here who have had similar experiences. And don't worry - you don't sound negative; you are very normal! Almost all of us find this site when we're needing support from people who get it, and that usually doesn't make for a lot of chipper intro posts.
    Laurie
    My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by JDspouse View Post
      It has only been one week since his classes started, but I can already identify with so many of the posts. I am unemployed at the moment, and although I do have some law school friends scattered about, they live in different cities and are pretty busy with their own families. I am trying not to sit at home having a pity party - I have joined a gym, looked for volunteer opportunities, searched for jobs, explored my local town, and, like another poster, dabbled on Craigslist. I used to be fun, involved, and interesting in my former life. Now, I'm feeling a bit lost, crazy, sad, frustrated, vulnerable, stupid (did I just give up my career?), worried (about the future), and confused (what happened to the spouse I knew?). And it is only the first week!
      Another lawyer here. There are lots of us. We've all BTDT. This is very well articulated. Welcome!
      Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

      Comment


      • #4
        Welcome! Not a lawyer but I gave up a great job to move to CA for my husband's med school too. Post often, we get it.
        Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

        Comment


        • #5
          Welcome!
          In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

          Comment


          • #6
            Glad I am not alone!

            Welcome!
            Wife to Hand Surgeon just out of training, mom to two lovely kittys and little boy, O, born in Sept 08.

            Comment


            • #7
              Welcome, you sound like you'll fit right in!
              Wife to PGY4 & Mother of 3.

              Comment


              • #8
                and nice to meet you! An attorney here too - just gave up my job when we moved for residency.

                And just because you signed on for this doesn't make it any easier. I think that's the hardest part of medicine, you don't really know what you're in for, there is a lot of change and a lot that is out of your control.

                You're doing all the right things so hang in there! The only other suggestion I have is to see if there is a spouses group at your DH's medical school.

                Are you licensed in CA or did you just take the July bar?
                Loving wife of neurosurgeon

                Comment


                • #9
                  Glad you found this place!
                  Needs

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Welcome!! I'm not a lawyer, but I can understand a lot of your feelings. I agree with Marissa that even though you signed up, you really don't know what you are in for, and it's such a big learning curve and adjustment. I find that the days vary from great, lonely, sad, independent, ok, wonderful, and on and on; and I'm still learning! This is a great place to find support, advice, or just a willing ear to hear your thoughts.

                    Welcome, looking forward to getting to know you more!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      You're doing all the right things so hang in there! The only other suggestion I have is to see if there is a spouses group at your DH's medical school.

                      Are you licensed in CA or did you just take the July bar?
                      [/QUOTE]
                      Thanks! I am licensed in California, so that makes the job search a bit easier. And I have also joined the spouse support group too.

                      THANKS EVERYBODY! I feel encouraged today.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Hi! Welcome! I went to college in Los Angeles, and Pasadena is one of my most favorite parts of southern California.
                        Julia - legislative process lover and general government nerd, married to a PICU & Medical Ethics attending, raising a toddler son and expecting a baby daughter Oct '16.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Welcome! Happy job hunting. My husband grew up in the Pasadena area and my cousin in law is a PD for Orange County. His dad does medical malpractice in the OC area.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Another attorney here and trust me I totally get it! We just moved for residency and I had to take another bar, ick! It is hard to admit how frustrating it can be to have your lives revolve around medicine even if it is what you signed up for because like MarissaNicole said you never really know what you're in for until you are experiencing it. As far as work goes I don't have a clue. I am currently a glorified law clerk and I worry about putting effort into a new job because we probably will want to have kids soon. All I can say is this grown-up balancing act is for the birds! Welcome, you are in good company!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Welcome!
                              Veronica
                              Mother of two ballerinas and one wild boy

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X