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Thank goodness I found this site!

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  • Thank goodness I found this site!

    I am new to this website and I have enjoyed reading what everyone has to say. Your insight and tidbits of information has gotten me through many a tough day lately.

    Let me introduce myself - I am the girlfriend of a first year psychiatry resident at Stanford University. I am in the process of moving out to California to be with him after spending my entire life on the East Coast. So needless to say, this is an enormous change for me - for the two of us. We are moving to a new place, starting new jobs and starting to live together all at the same time. There has been just a little stress in our lives lately and the distance apart from each other these past 2 months has been hard (he had to be out there at the end of June).

    We have been dating for almost 3 years and there was never any doubt in my mind that I would go with him, it has just taken awhile for me to adjust to the concept of moving to the other coast as I am very attached to my family and friends. I was never keen on California, even during his residency application process, but he did his undergrad at Stanford and just really enjoyed being back there during his interviews. Not to mention, the program had everything he wanted and they are very into residents having a personal AND a professional life.

    Anyhow, reading this site the last couple of days as I toil away with organizing my stuff, pack boxes, schedule to ship my car and my belongings, purchase plane tickets has helped me see that there are so many others out there that have done what I am doing and all turned out well. Thanks for being there.

  • #2
    Welcome to the site. You will find lots of support here. Moving is always hard. I never imagined moving from Texas to Ohio when DH started his residency. It took me awhile to adjust but eventually I have somewhat after six years At least you get to be in sunny California.
    Hope to read more about you.

    Trisha

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    • #3
      It's true--the site should be called godsend.com.

      We moved in together as he started med school, and I don't know if making the two transitions at the same time made things more difficult or less difficult, but we survived it. It presented "special challenges" perhaps--like knowing that we had to lay down certain ground rules right from the beginning because bad habits would be much harder to break later, but not wanting to get on his case when he's already stressed out. ("You can't leave wet towels on wooden furniture, Bachelor Boy!" )

      Anyway, good luck. You sound like you're on top of things. I'm looking forward to hearing how you work out the challenges and excitement ahead.
      Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
      Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

      “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
      Lev Grossman, The Magician King

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      • #4
        Welcome Bella,
        We applied to Stanford, but never made it out for an interview. I can't remember if we weren't invited, or if it was 9th month of pregnancy.
        Did you find a place to live in Palo Alto? I hear it's getting a bit more reasonable than it was?
        I'm still in the adjustment phase of yet another move - it takes awhile. Feel free to come here and spout off.
        Enabler of DW and 5 kids
        Let's go Mets!

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        • #5
          Welcome Bella,

          You will find many displaced individuals here following their s.o.'s medical career. If it is any hope...things do get better.

          Welcome to the boards.

          Kelly
          In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

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          • #6
            Bella, my husband is a final year med student at Stanford. We actually have a friend who is a 2nd year psych resident. We have lived here for 3+ years so please feel free to private message me with any questions, etc! I wasn't nuts about moving here at first either, we're both from the midwest but it kind of grows on you. We're doing residency apps now and hope to be going elsewhere come June.

            Welcome to the sight, it is a god send and I'm happy to help. If you want to get together for coffee, I'm up for that too!

            Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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            • #7
              Welcome to the site. I was soooo happy when I found it. It has really saved my sanity on many occasions. This medical life is a roller coaster, constantly up & down emotionally. Good luck with your move.
              Luanne
              Luanne
              wife, mother, nurse practitioner

              "You have not converted a man because you have silenced him." (John, Viscount Morely, On Compromise, 1874)

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