Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

It would be extraordinarily dangerous for me to take my kids out of the car for me to walk 10 ft to the ATM, and then have them running around while I am doing my banking... But I guess I could get arrested for this?

There are so many tragic stories out there. I just don't think you can prevent everything.

[Flynn]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I do leave my kids in the car on very rare occasions.

I always have the car off, locked, I have the keys, and I am never more than ten feet away and the car is always in sight. My daughter could get out of her carseat at 21 months if she felt like it. :roll

I think every situation is different.

I will say I was HORRIFIED when I waved to a woman I knew in a mall parking lot, I ended up parking near her causing me to walk right by her car after she had gone into Barnes and Noble. Her 18 month old was asleep in the car. The woman was over 150 feet away, INSIDE a store, and the temp. was 10 degrees. The child was left in a crowded parking lot. I was so upset. I don't know this person well and I happened to be without my kids at the time (DH was home with them) so what did I do? I walked back to my car (about 4 cars away and across the isle so I could see her car perfectly) and waited for her to come back out making sure nobody messed with the car or the child. Since I was warm in my car not turned on I felt the child was okay. The woman came out 20 minutes later with her coffee and a book. :tsk: :tsk:


I did nothing other than tell DH but I honestly wanted to report her.
Am I making too much of this or is the above story an example of neglect?

Sorry for the hijack but I thought this story related. The woman in the article posted seemed to be much more on the ball than the woman in my story. Where should the line be drawn?

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

The line is drawn, IMO, when the mom can't see her children. (As in can't see her children's FACES...) The 10-ft rule is good. That's about 3 paces away. I always take the keys with me, too...

ETA: I do leave them with Kate in the car b/c she's legally of age to babysit. And only for max of 2 minutes. And I've only done it 2 times... And I take the keys and lock them in! But that's only b/c she's old enough-- I don't leave Luke in the car, and he's 3.

[PrincessFiona]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

There is a fine line...and I've crossed it.

I don't take my kids out of the car in the freezing cold here if I go in to pay for gas...and on some days by the time I get Aidan to the Montessori school the teachers have already gone in and I have to take him in myself. (They usually come to the car.) My van is always parked about 15 feet from the entrance of the school, but I have to take him in and get his school shoes on and run him to the classroom. Most of the time, I can see the car, but not for the entire time. Also, on days where I am late to Amanda's school because of traffic or something I have to run up the steps and get her. I do it quickly and I can only not see the car for about 30 seconds...but I do it. I can't imagine having to drag Zoe and Aidan (sleeping) out of the van and carry them in to get her.

It certainly not running into Barnes and Nobles for 20 minutes and coming out with coffee and a book....but...I guess I have a false feeling of safety. I'm so tired of the judgment by society.

Aren't we all just doing the best that we can? :huh:

We're not talking about leaving our kids in the car for hours in bad weather to go smoke our crack pipes.

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I just didn't even know you can be arrested for something like what happened in the original case.

:huh: :huh: :huh:

I get judged plenty for letting my kids walk to the bus stop (Kate, in the cold morning) and next year the twins are walking themselves home from school. :huh: Oh well...

[rainbabies]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

the charges have been dropped.

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I agree with the part that Julie quoted -- her children were not unattended if they were out of sight. I agree about the temperature or other conditions changing the situation.

I just did this today -- I left the kids buckled in the car watching a DVD. I was mostly in the other garage stall breakingdown cardboard boxes that have been spawning in the corner. I really don't know when else I can do this. It is pouring buckets out and I don't want them outside. The garage floor gets really slippery and I can't watch them in the house if I am in the garage...

Running in to the bookstore for 20 minutes is not ok at all but there has to be some middle ground. If kids are choking on small objects, wouldn't that be a hazard while driving, say in heavy traffic? Certainly more dangerous if no one is around but it seems like the small object is more the issue.

Can I get the corner cell with a view?

btw, whoever asked -- depending on the carseat, my kids were able to unbuckle by 2 yo.

[migirl]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

My personal standard for leaving the kiddo in the car is, would you leave a million bucks on the back seat in the same situation?

I use a similar standard: If I wouldn't leave my purse in the car, then I won't leave my kid.

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I leave my purse in the car all the time. u:

[PrincessFiona]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I leave my purse in the car all the time. u:

me too! Sadly, I even leave my laptop and cell phone in my car sometimes too...without always making sure the door is locked. Clearly, I feel way too safe in this small town!

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I do lock it. :huh:

I don't leave my kids in the car when I go in somewhere, but I will totally leave them in the car when I run up to the Blockbuster drop off or something similar (always take the keys and lock it -- too many stories about kids acidentally putting a car in gear, etc.). And I'll admit that I used to leave Jacob in the car when I'd run in to use an ATM. I remember being left in the car as a kid, and so initially I didn't think there was anything wrong w/it. Upon reflection I realized it was not the best choice.

And I'll agree about the HUGE difference between 20 minutes browing in Barnes & Noble vs. running a kid into school.

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I'm going shopping for a laptop. :>

[PrincessFiona]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I do lock it. :huh:

Very smart! I have no defense.

I have to say that I don't leave my kids alone in the car for longer than 30 seconds to a minute...just so I'm clear that I'm not hanging out getting massages from Sven while they're putting the car into gear and driving off on a crime spree. :>

[Cumberland]

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

I leave my 4yo in the car while I go inside to pick up my 22mo from MDO 2x a week. I am gone for roughly a minute and she is out of my sight. I take the keys and lock her in. I feel comfortable she will be fine- my main worry is that someone else will take offense. I will leave them in the car when I go into stores with glass windows where I can see them through the windows-like the drycleaners. I do think it is the same as leaving them inside the house while I go check the mail.

I have vivid memories of hanging out in the car for an hour with my sisters while my mom got some groceries or something else. I think it was more of the norm then.

I think the situation escalated bc she did not cooperate with the police. She wouldnt even tell them her name until her husband came. Her behavior probably infuriated the police officer and resulted in her arrest.

Re: Mom Faces Trial for Leaving Child in car

There are SO many situations where taking the kids out of the car is impractical, many of which have already been mentioned. I have 5 kids and I'm not about to unbuckle everyone for something that will take a minute and they are in my sight of view. I'll park in front of Starbucks and run in to get coffee. It would take me longer to unbuckle, get the kids out and get them into Starbucks, get my coffee, bring them back to the car and buckle them. Coffee by myself, a few minutes. Getting coffee with all the kids with me, 15 minutes. Granted, coffee is not important (although some may disagree). Just an example.