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kindergarten "red shirting"- again

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  • #61
    Originally posted by Chrisada View Post
    I spent alot of time in my son's class and saw that the younger boys were so immature, always getting in trouble, could barely write their name, and were a distraction to the other kids. Here, kindergarten is not mandatory, and you must be in first grade at six, so parents red shirting isn't really an option, but since the cut off wasn't until Dec. 1, kids like my son, are actually red shirted by the state.
    Yeah, that's different. I'm talking about developmentally normal children red-shirted by parents to get an "advantage" in academics, sports, whatever. It was rampant in Wellesley, MA where I briefly lived. Literally the entire kindy was 6.
    Married to a Urology Attending! (that is an understated exclamation point)
    Mama to C (Jan 2012), D (Nov 2013), and R (April 2016). Consulting and homeschooling are my day jobs.

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    • #62
      Random thoughts from Laurie... It seems like they're pushing academics earlier. I believe reading is expected about a year earlier than when I was in school, and they start math sooner. I wonder if red-shirting helps because it puts the kids at a more developmentally appropriate level of curriculum? Maybe the problem is too advanced expectations for many 5 year olds, and the rampant "gift years" are just a symptom?
      Laurie
      My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)

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      • #63
        Originally posted by ladymoreta View Post
        Random thoughts from Laurie... It seems like they're pushing academics earlier. I believe reading is expected about a year earlier than when I was in school, and they start math sooner. I wonder if red-shirting helps because it puts the kids at a more developmentally appropriate level of curriculum? Maybe the problem is too advanced expectations for many 5 year olds, and the rampant "gift years" are just a symptom?

        Yes this. There is a lot of academic pressure in kindergarten now, especially in affluent areas.


        Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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        • #64
          And sports is crazy too. My son is 7, and is going into his fourth season of baseball. He is built for sports (very tall and muscular) and enjoys it. But those kids who didn't play t-ball starting at 4 are already behind by the time they hit Little League officially in 1st grade. The same for swimming, etc.


          Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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          • #65
            When I read this thread and others about preschools, camps and sports it makes me start freaking out that I'm not doing enough for my kid. I feel pressured to send him to K at five even though most people say to give him another year. I don't want him to be behind. On the other hand though I don't want him to be over-scheduled. I feel like I need to go get him signed up for soccer and make sure he's reading soon or he isn't going to get into college. I know this is only the beginning. If we hold him back it would be in hopes that he would be successful. I don't expect him to be a leader or him to be a sports superstar but I do want him to enjoy school and learn a love of physical activity and the joy of teamwork. I'm afraid of people thinking that it was done for him to get ahead. As far as I can tell there are not any state regulations that say he can't start kinder at six.


            Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
            Wife of Anesthesiology Resident

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            • #66
              As someone who is just finishing K with my oldest, they are definitely a year ahead of where we were as kids academically.
              Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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              • #67
                Originally posted by civilspouse View Post
                When I read this thread and others about preschools, camps and sports it makes me start freaking out that I'm not doing enough for my kid. I feel pressured to send him to K at five even though most people say to give him another year. I don't want him to be behind. On the other hand though I don't want him to be over-scheduled. I feel like I need to go get him signed up for soccer and make sure he's reading soon or he isn't going to get into college. I know this is only the beginning. If we hold him back it would be in hopes that he would be successful. I don't expect him to be a leader or him to be a sports superstar but I do want him to enjoy school and learn a love of physical activity and the joy of teamwork. I'm afraid of people thinking that it was done for him to get ahead. As far as I can tell there are not any state regulations that say he can't start kinder at six.


                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                Step number one, do not give a second thought to what others think. Do what is best for your son, forget the rest.
                Tara
                Married 20 years to MD/PhD in year 3 of MFM fellowship. SAHM to five wonderful children (#6 due in August), a sweet GSD named Bella, a black lab named Toby, and 1 guinea pig.

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                • #68
                  kindergarten "red shirting"- again

                  My son was one of the youngest. Interestingly, many of the youngest in his graduating class are also in the top ten academically - but wouldn't be called "leaders". Leadership seems to get tied up in physical size and sport success here.

                  Random thought one: this seems to be a more suburban trend for us. Didn't happen at all in our Brookline neighborhood which was affluent but not sports crazed. Very common in our current affluent neighborhood.

                  Random thought two. Sports teams set up around birthdays and they don't necessarily line up with school ages. Kids like to be on teams with the boys in their own grade, so that's something to check in to.
                  Angie
                  Gyn-Onc fellowship survivor - 10 years out of the training years; reluctant suburbanite
                  Mom to DS (18) and DD (15) (and many many pets)

                  "Where are we going - and what am I doing in this handbasket?"

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                  • #69
                    I agree with Pollyanna. My boys played soccer early because it was fun and they enjoyed it....if that is the case for your son (or you think it might be), go for it. If you are on the fence about sending him to kindergarten, wait a year. I don't think you will be sorry.
                    Wife of an OB/Gyn, mom to three boys, middle school choir teacher.

                    "I don't know when Dad will be home."

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                    • #70
                      Originally posted by Sheherezade View Post
                      Random thought two. Sports teams set up around birthdays and they don't necessarily line up with school ages. Kids like to be on teams with the boys in their own grade, so that's something to check in to.
                      Good thought. Soccer teams here have a July 1 cut-off, and middle son has a friend (young for his grade) that faced (every other year) having to be on rec soccer teams with kids a year behind him at school. He hated it!
                      Wife of an OB/Gyn, mom to three boys, middle school choir teacher.

                      "I don't know when Dad will be home."

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                      • #71
                        DS #2 has a summer birthday -- it was our choice when we enrolled him in Kindergarten and we go to a public school. July birthdays are a judgement call for parents. We "red shirted" DS #2 for a variety of reasons.

                        Emotionally I didn't think he was ready -- academically he was fine. I totally LOVED the extra year with him and he did too. He thrived in preschool and we had a ton of time to bond together. It was a good choice for him. Additionally 98% of parents (got the stat from the district) "red shirt" out here.

                        We have a bunch of friends who sent their kids when they were 5. Four out of ten families then HELD THEIR KID back because they weren't above average academically (double doc families). Whatever. They jumped through all the hoops and paid for all the tests -- THEN the school let them hold their kids back based on the data. These families got an extra year of public school on the tax payers -- BUT they saved a ton in that year on daycare (which is why most of the people we know do it).

                        For us the only down side is for soccer. He has to play on a team that is U7 his first year. I'm not too worried about it. He's big and the youngest so he's a bit more worldly than that average Kindergartener. Other than that, there is NO down side for us. NONE.
                        Flynn

                        Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

                        “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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