kindergarten "red shirting"- again

[peggyfromwastate]

A I'm so sad to read that M is still having so much anxiety.

Hugs to you!

Last year my ds9 hated school so so much. Hated. He looked at me with such sadness every day when I dropped him off. I have been there with kids who truly do not like school. It's so tough.

[moonlight]

Houself- We are nearly in a similar situation. Thankfully DD has a early Nov birthday and there's no question she will not be starting Kinder next year. K1 and DD will start at the same time, 2015 here we come! With the speech delays and therapies I'm so thankful we get another year. I'm don't think she would be ready next year, but its hard to say. DD is flourishing in her new school making such good progress. I hope we can stay another year so they can really get her all set for Kinder. I already have a 'Pre Kinder" summer class at a private school picked out.

My only worry (you might have thought about this?) is 1. Will she need services when she starts Kinder? 2. If she does, how well will the school be equipped for her? 3. Do I ditch ST through the public school and arrange it myself? Anywho... that's where my thinking is at this point. Fortunately, we have plenty of time to get it all hashed out.

BTW In this state the public school cut off is August 1.

[houseelf]

Quick tangent, I'm trying to Google this California kindergarten thing. Is this new compulsory first grade attendance at age 6 an unintended by product of rolling the kindergarten date back to September first along with the advent of transitional kindergarten? If your kid is young and not successful in K, do they anticipate more "bonus" kindergarten years? Anyone?

[spotty_dog]

Quick tangent, I'm trying to Google this California kindergarten thing. Is this new compulsory first grade attendance at age 6 an unintended by product of rolling the kindergarten date back to September first along with the advent of transitional kindergarten? If your kid is young and not successful in K, do they anticipate more "bonus" kindergarten years? Anyone?

"Since school is mandatory for six year old students, parents and guardians must enroll their children in school once they reach the age of six (EC Section 48200). Depending on a child's birthdate, it is a local decision (with parental input) whether the six year old student will be enrolled in kindergarten or first grade." http://www.cde.ca.gov/ci/gs/em/kinderfaq.asp#E5

[houseelf]

It took me awhile but this article explains WHY it is hard to find a spot for a redshirted kindergartner (NY jurisdiction but I assume the driving force is the same):

http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2...cussions/?_r=0

I have a Google tic. What the hell did people do before the internet?

[OrionGrad]

But can't people still get around any new restrictions (in California or elsewhere) by going private for the first few years? What happens if you try to switch back to public in 2nd or 3rd grade?

[houseelf]

But can't people still get around any new restrictions (in California or elsewhere) by going private for the first few years? What happens if you try to switch back to public in 2nd or 3rd grade?

As Shereze...I mean Angie (I still can not spell that after all these years) pointed out, a child from another State or district might be at an advantage or disadvantage depending on the former state's guidelines for admission. This is an issue that pertains to a lot of kids in medicine. Of course, like Orion Grad pointed out, those who can will probably be able to support the entrance of their choice by opting out vis a vis private school.

[Rapunzel]

I'm taking a class right now on the development of Executive Functioning Skills in children and adolescents. It's eye-opening. Generally speaking cut the physical age of your child by 2/3 and that is the average frontal lobe development in him/her. Our culture is not conducive to actual brain development -with the frontal lobe (in charge of impulsiveness, organization, time management, goal setting and attainment, flexibility, task managent, etc) not reaching maturity until 25 years. If you suspect your child isn't ready emotionally for kindergarten or college - you're right.

[WolfpackWife]

I didn't even know this was something that happens - it's truly fascinating to me. While I completely understand reasons that occur on a per-child bases (being ready developmentally/socially/mentally/emotionally), to think that this is the sort of thing that some parents use as a means of strategy to advance their children for sports or academics or to place them ahead of other students, is disappointing. When did everything get so competitive?

[Sheherezade]

It's ALL competitive. It's truly sickening. I feel for kids today. They either have to be immune to it through some posturing or they have to be on all the time.

[migirl]

kindergarten "red shirting"- again

When did everything get so competitive?

Not to take this off into another tangent, but the pressure to compete in team sports at such a young age is so disappointing to me.

DS7 enjoys playing soccer and has several peers who have left the rec soccer team that he's on to play the more competitive travel soccer. Travel soccer is just not something that we - as a family - can commit to (too much time, too much money), and it makes me sad to think that he might be at a disadvantage later on if he wants to continue to play throughout his school career.

These kids are starting this at 5,6 years old. I think it's INSANE.

[spotty_dog]

DS7 enjoys playing soccer and has several peers who have left the rec soccer team that he's on to play the more competitive travel soccer. Travel soccer is just not something that we - as a family - can commit to (too much time, too much money), and it makes me sad to think that he might be at a disadvantage later on if he wants to continue to play throughout his school career.

I love this article about a new approach to coaching young kids' soccer: http://www.socceramerica.com/article...ckup-game.html

And this one, about "travel" teams before the teenage years being detrimental to the development of players:
http://www.vysa.com/coaches/99579.html

"After all, we need U12 National Champions, otherwise how will we be able to identify the players of the future -- winning is everything. Yet, in the 30-plus years that we have had organized youth soccer on a mass scale, we have not yet produced even one truly world class player!"

[peggyfromwastate]

"Since school is mandatory for six year old students, parents and guardians must enroll their children in school once they reach the age of six (EC Section 48200). Depending on
a child's birthdate, it is a local decision (with parental input) whether the six year old student will be enrolled in kindergarten or first grade." http://www.cde.ca.gov/ci/gs/em/kinderfaq.asp#E5

Our locality has chosen to interpret this very strictly---- so that if you are 6, you go to first. No appeals granted. This happened to several families from our coop who gave their children an extra year to "be young". The kids were thrown to the sharks as soon as they enrolled in public school. The first grade teacher would have to say that the child is not ready, and it takes a lot to change this ruling.

This is under scrutiny and debate--- some legislators are working to put more power back in the hands of the parents in deciding when to enroll in first.

As far as transfers, the schools here were very concerned that my kids would be far behind. Apparently military kids who transfer from more of the "Podunk" states have a lot if trouble and testing puts them far behind the CA standards. But they don't throw them back a few years, they just expect them to catch up. With little support and way too many kids per teacher. The common core and standardized testing is paramount, and kids must meet certain levels or be thrown in some type of alternative school setting.

We were fortunate (I guess) that the educational requirements and standards were similar in Maryland. Unfortunately the focus on standardized testing is way more insidious here.

CA is a big big state. I live in a very wealthy and competitive area. Every strip mall has a tutoring center in it. Kids are generally enrolled in "enrichment" classes starting in elem. it's extremely high pressure.

[moonlight]

I heard in my music program teacher training that parents put their toddlers in these music classes in hopes of giving them some sort of gimmick (music ability) to propel them through jr and high school and land them into the Ivy League or college scholarships. People are scheming before they baby is 2 years old. Its insane.

We were told to keep our eye out for these type of gunner parents. We can't kick them out of the program, but its Not a encouraged way of thinking when joining the class.

[mommax3]

My oldest was born in mid-April and started school when he was five. He was academically beyond ready, but had issues with organization and self-control. In the four schools he attended, he was always one of the younger kids. In high school, he had kids in his class that were more than a year older, and shared an exact birthday with a kid in the class behind him. He is currently 6'5 + and somewhere around 220, so his size was never an issue, but emotional maturity was.

My middle son (currently 15) has the late May bday. I wish we had held him back. He is not as academically gifted as his brothers, nor is he as outgoing or as big. If I had known we would end up here, I absolutely would have, but I didn't. He started school in TX, where the cut off was 9/1, but after his first grade year, we moved to IN, where the cut off (at the time) was 7/1. That move, combined with curricular differences between schools/states (he hadn't learned math facts in his TX 1st grade class, but his new IN 2nd grade classmates had learned them the year before, so he was behind) turned my happy-go-lucky boy into a child who dreaded school. Only now is he starting (as a sophomore) to seem more confident to me. If he is at all hesitant about going away to school when he graduates, we will fully support him living at home and attending IUPUI, (Indy satellite campus of IU and Purdue) at least to start.

My youngest has a September birthday and turned 6 about 3 weeks after he started kindergarten. Every aspect of his schooling has been easier. We haven't had the behavioral concerns we had with oldest or the academic concerns we had with #2.

I think the late May bday is a strong indicator towards holding a child (particularly a boy, for reasons already mentioned by others) back....but I would take other things into account as well, like personality, maturity (emotional and physical), and general intellectual curiosity. My oldest seems to be doing well at college and has grown into his big personality and strong will. I don't know that holding him back would have diminished any of the issues we had with him, and one of us (or both!) may not have survived if he had been at home one more year.

I don't hear many parents second-guess holding their kids back, but I have heard several second-guess their decisions to *not* hold their children back.....just food for thought.