Should we stop talking politics?

[PrincessFiona]

After some internal debate, I can't help but ask this question. Should the debate forum be simply a discussion of ideas unrelated to politics?

kris

[PrincessFiona]

If you're brave enough...come out of the closet 8) and discuss this. We have unfortunately offended some of our users with our adamant political discussions that do indeed tend to slant left. How can we be better about including everyone's different political beliefs so that no one feels left out?

[spotty_dog]

I am uncomfortable talking politics sometimes because I don't feel like I have all the information. I'm afraid I might come off as a doof. But in this election I really want to be an informed and enthusiastic participant in the electoral process, and this board has been a great place so far for me to explore what I *really* feel on various issues. I think we're adults here and for the most part can give and take with aplomb.

Elsewhere the input of people with different views than mine has been really educational. I'd love to continue hearing "the other side" around here.

[BonBon]

I am uncomfortable talking politics sometimes because I don't feel like I have all the information. I'm afraid I might come off as a doof.

Alison, this is exactly why I never get involved in political discussions online or elsewhere. I hate looking like an idiot, even though I may very well be one. I like to keep my idiocy a secret.

[BonBon]

Oh yeah, and to answer the original question, I vote no. I like to hear a lot of different perspectives. I may not agree with them all, but they definitely offer food for thought. And who knows, I may change my mind on certain issues.

As I wrote in my post under the Conservatives subject, I don't enjoy participating in most political debates. I'm glad we have the option, though, and when I have time I try to read what others have written. If I feel that something will offend me or get me too worked up, then I just won't read it- it's not a big deal.

Kris, I really think that having this forum has encouraged me to think more about issues I ignore. Maybe I'll jump in sometime.

Kris,

I'm actually kind of floored that you'd even be asking this question. Censorship is NEVER the answer just because some people are offended. They have the freedom to read, post, or ignore it all, as we all do. Did you know that censorship is actually the one thing the right and left agree on completely? They both love it, although for very different reasons. Scares the wits out of me... 8O

I've found these discussions most interesting, learning about the kinds of people who are here. In many cases we have only one thing in common, and that's the fact that we are all in a relationship with a physician. That we are a (mostly) well-educated lot where quite a few of us are on the Dem side is very telling, in more ways than one. If you're going to run this board, my feeling is that you have to deal with the actual composition of the board, not perform some act of "affirmative action" to make sure every view is given equal time and no one is offended. If you try that, you'll have failed before you've started. I don't find the complaints that there is a liberal slant here valid at all. I think the better question would be "Why are so many of the physician spouses here on the Democratic side?" From what I know of all of you, I'm surprised that it's not the other way around completely, so I'd be interested to hear more about this.

The anger expressed here doesn't surprise me at all, as we have become, as a nation, the most divided since the Civil War, and I don't see the end of that in sight any time soon. Some of us even hate each other because of political differences, which mirrors what is going on all over the country. Everything has become so black and white, and it seems we've lost the ability to decide things on the issues themselves, which is the saddest thing of all. Regardless, we need a place to air our opinions; even if all we learn is that this country is angry and divided.

I was never interested in politics until recently--in fact I ignored it completely. But all that has happened has forced me to decide who I am and where I stand, and what I've come up with has surprised me greatly.

[PrincessFiona]

Well, Elizabeth, the problem is that politics can really be a button-pusher for some people. Most of us hold our beliefs pretty close to our hearts you know. 8) People come here for support/information during the medical training years and some are offended by some of the more vocal opinions...my vocal opinions being right up there.

I don't think anyone here was suggesting censorship...at the same time because of some hurt feelings that cropped up recently I did have cause to ask if it is appropriate to place a debate forum in the middle of a medical spouse website. It appears that everyone so far would like for it to stay.

The problem...and let me be blunt here...is that topics quickly can deterioriate and we've had some name-calling or angry PMs/emails between the members who disagree on certain issues. As a result, instead of the website providing what for some is much needed support, it creates unhappiness for those people. If individuals are unable to police their own words, then it falls on the administrators of the website...and no one wants to take on that task.

I find that I always end up thinking more about why I believe what I believe when I debate with others...and at the end of the day, isn't that what it boils down to?...our core beliefs. We can all 'spin' the news any way that we want in order to make it fit our candidates, our beliefs and our core values. That's why politics is so difficult to debate with family and friends...people feel attacked at the core of who they are.

I believe that the fact that we are so polarized in this election year means that people's feelings will be a little closer to their hearts than usual. I disagree with some of my conservative colleagues, but wouldn't go as far as to say that it has anything to do with their level of education. I think it is often just a question of where we are at in our lives, how we were raised and what we believe...which is why when it is rejected, we personally can feel rejected.

I'm all for keeping the debate forum too, but we all have to understand that just because someone believes differently doesn't mean that they are wrong and we are right or vice versa...it means we see things differently based on the information we are evaluating...as seen through the lense of our own lives.

[PrincessFiona]

Also, let me just add that I'm not trying to run an 'affirmative action' initiative. I will say though that there are some republicans/conservatives here who feel....disenfranchised. We liberals can be a noisy, rambunctious, opinionated bunch (OK, I speak for myself!) and it isn't a lot of fun to debate us.

So I'm never going to get an answer to my question about why so many of us are one way? Thanks.

I was thrilled when you moved this forum all by itself and put the disclaimers on it to warn away those who did not wish to participate, and only wanted to be on the happy, supportive side of things. I thought that was equitable in the extreme. But what you don't understand is that the kind of support I need here is to be able to discuss things that really matter, and without that I have no reason to be here any longer. Where should we go to discuss such things? Or should we just pretend they don't exist? I'm so tired of planting a smile on my face and acting like nothing's wrong, and lying about feeling bad and worrying about other's feelings instead of my own. I'm so tired of giving and getting nothing in return, not even consideration. I thought this board was for real people in all their messy glory. It appears I was wrong.

[PrincessFiona]

Elizabeth, this is a forum for people to discuss anything that they want to..and as you see, no one closed the forum to debate. No one asked you or anyone else to pretend that these things don't exist. All I'm asking for is a little tolerance of other people's views from all of us...I"m not asking anyone to plant a fake smile on their face, to not have the right to say what they feel, etc. I'm asking for us to be tolerant of each other. For example, suggesting that more educated people are democrats

That we are a (mostly) well-educated lot where quite a few of us are on the Dem side is very telling, in more ways than one.

could be interpreted as...oh, I don't know...offensive to our conservative members? Have an opinion guys...say your opinion...just not in a way that atttacks/hurts another person.

I'm also tired of hearing the "I'm right/you're wrong now I'm taking my ball home and I'm not playing anymore" attitudes.

If you can't handle an honest, open discussion of ideas without attacking other people (and I am not directing this at any person in particular, please do not send me any more PMs today, people!) then don't come in and debate/discuss ideas.

Furthermore, from now on, any posts that attack another person will simply be closed. If I have to take the heat for all of this then I will create some rules.

[Phoebe]

I am for keeping the political discussion going. I think the debate forum was a great idea. I am not an informed enough citizen to put my two cents in about politics/current events. I don't really enjoy politics, but will educated enough by the time election day rolls around. Plus, I don't affiliate myself with one political party, although I do lean towards the left.

Kris, you and the administrators have done a great job. You can't please everyone.

Jennifer

What I meant to say was that we are a mostly well educated lot, meaning some of us have very advanced degrees. And a majority of the membership seem to lean to the Democratic. I meant those as two separate thoughts. It hurts me to hear that you're looking for things in my words to accuse me of attacking others. I meant no such thing.

I can't take this anymore.

[Meenah]

I like the debate forum and think the disclaimer says all that needs to be said. We are adults here, we have moved the debates to a separate forum, so I personally believe if anyone becomes personally upset with another's opinions, they should not come to the debate forum. "If you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen". Isn't that why we moved the debats to separate forum in the first place?????
I really do enjoy this website, and if we get rid of the debates I will still be here, but I feel as if it gives the debaters a legitimate playing field!!
Luanne

[SueC]

I like the debate forum, too! I don't really get involved with the political discussions for the above mentioned reasons--I don't want to appear stupid and politically I feel pretty uninformed a lot of the time. I know what I believe in and which issues are important to me but I can't defend my position very well. Anyhow, the debates are going to happen whether there is a special forum for them or not, but at least when there is a separate forum it seems less offensive than when some rabid debate crops up in even the most innocent of topics. Being that we are in an election year, it's natural that a lot of the debates will be political in nature. It's unfortunate that you have to deal with people PM'ing you all the time Kris over this--I say if somebody can't participate in a debate without getting p*ssed off and threatening to leave the board altogether than that's their problem.