an interesting perspective

The three weeks Jon had off were soooo fabulous. He didn't have any time off from the two jobs and full load of college courses he had with our first. He also didn't even have a day off from med school when the twins were born - I know what you mean about having health problems while you have two newborns just home from the NICU (well you had one, but you get my point - you had two toddlers anyway!) and your husband has to go to work the very next day. Jon managed to have about a day and a half off while I was in the hospital, but during that time he was studying for an exam he had to take a couple of days later. UGH! So, as I was saying, having these three weeks off felt like such a luxury to me! And, as far as bonding, Jon has definitely bonded more quickly and much better with this last child than he did with any of the other kids. Sad, but true.



Jennifer

Jennifer,



To answer your question -- in residency, he was allowed a week of paternity leave and was made to feel lucky that he got to take it, since he was rotating off the OB/GYN service at that point and was on Trauma Surgery. In the four years that we were in San Antonio, I never knew of a father that took more than a week off when he had a new baby. The females usually took six weeks, but in doing so forfeited their allotted three weeks of leave for that year.



As for this last baby, when he was born, there were only two OB/GYNs here -- my husband and his partner, the doc who delivered my baby. The baby happened (with a little medical encouragement) to make his appearance on Friday night preceding my husband's weekend off, so he was off Saturday and Sunday, and then back to work on Monday (and call that night) because with only two of them, there was no way around it. A third doc has since been added, but still the most time my husband can take as leave at one time is two weeks.



Hope that clarifies things ---



Sally

I have to admit I was a little surprised while reading this. In my opinion, giving birth is a natural process, it's not something the woman resident should be blamed for- it's the policy that structures the hours and cover in such an inflexible way. I don't think women should be blamed for wanting to have children. Women don't plan to have difficult pregnancies or have complications to recover from afterwards. And the fact is that women need more maternity leave than men, because they are also recovering physically. It doesn't mean that they are any less dedicated. Suppose a woman resident gets pregnant accidentally- should she get an abortion as to not inconvenience her colleagues? The US has notoriously inflexible maternity leaves for everyone, although I know residents have it especially difficult. However, I believe that the number of women in medicine has been increasing so much that the programs (and discrimination in practices, apparantly) are going to have to start creating more accomodating policies. From what some have posted about paternity leave, it sounds like resident programs need to start thinking about more humane scheduling.