Is it bad...

that I'm keeping imsn as my secret and not telling DH?

I randomly bring up recent topics here to him, (i.e. retreats, advice re scrubs, mortgages, etc.) and he's looking at me like "dude, where are all these questions coming from?"

And I respond with a grin.

Just out of curiousity, how did your DH/DW respond when you told them you found a medical spouse forum?

[Vanquisher]

My dh was thrilled that I found a place to find support and bitch, and that I didn't have to rely on him for this, as I had been. Mostly, he is eternally grateful to this site for helping me, but occassionally it has bit him in the ass when I am in a sour mood because of something happening here.

[pstone]

My wife laughs, asks if I talk about laundry stains.

"you don't post anything personal do you?"

Re: Is it bad...

I randomly bring up recent topics here to him, (i.e. retreats, advice re scrubs, mortgages, etc.) and he's looking at me like "dude, where are all these questions coming from?"

That's funny, we did the same thing. I remember a conversation while we were driving in downtown Cleveland...about how some med schools do prosections instead of disections in Gross Anatomy. I could see in the back of his mind he was thinking, "where is she getting this info..."

DH is slightly amused by the website. He has said things like, "why don't you go to THAT website and find out..."

[Tenacious_D]

DH is pretty cool with it (made fun of me at first though)...but he is not a fan of his name being mentioned...esp when I bitch about things he has done.

at first my dh thought I was nutty. now he knows these people are my friends. the only time he gets weird about it is if I've posted something about an arguement on here. he gets really defensive - as though I've spilled our personal details to our neighbors.

[SuzySunshine]

My DH thought I was nutty at first too - now he realizes that its a good out for me when he's not around and prefers I come here and vent then get mad at him. More people IRL know I belong to an online resident spouse community, some look at me like I'm weird others have finally realized being married to a dawkter isn't all its cracked up to be.

My husband teased me about it when I was still a lurker. Now, he seems interested (or humors me at least) when I tell him about something I read on here. I think he's glad I found a place where others feel my pain!

[rainbabies]

dh is actuall interested in all the peeps here. he will ask me how some of you all are doing...ones i talk about. he will come home and ask "how are the women?" (no offense guys )

he will even ask me to to post a thought or question, or search something he is interested in: jobs, taxes, placement, malpractice...blah, blah.

[GrayMatterWife]

At first he seemed less than thrilled. Neurosurgery is a really small world (there are only about 150 new NSG residents matched a year in the US) and I think he was concerned that I would write about something that might get read by someone and would eventually come back to him negatively. On one hand, that was a little paranoid ("Um, you're just not THAT interesting, dear, and neither is your program..."). On the other hand, I didn't want to do something that made him uncomfortable. However, he also saw that the website was great for me. I often feel like no one among my family, nonmedical friends, or professional world really understands what this life is about. So we came to an understanding: I don't write about any specific complaints I have about his program (no "the Chairman is an as$hole!!" kind of stuff--which, (1) I wouldn't do, anyway, and (2) the Chairman isn't an as$hole). I mean, I don't fabricate sunny details about his program or about NSG, but I don't name names, so to speak.

He asks me about certain people sometimes, because I have told him about some folks.

He definitely does NOT know my log-in info, though!!

[Auspicious]

He sees it as a good source of information, as I do. And he likes an interesting story as much as I do. We've had lots of good conversations launched by topics that have first come up here--I want to find out his take on a topic just like I want to find out all of yours.

He'll ask me "Sooo, how're the folks at spedmouse today?"

[Momo]

DH was really happy for me! He thought it was a great idea to have a virtual support community!

[PrincessFiona]

Many moons ago, dh used to refer to this as my "pretend life" with the "people who aren't real".

That has changed. He loves lurking in the general forums (no private forum privileges of course) and has been known to call me and say "you better get online and go to the debate forum" or "where is so-and-so...she hasn't posted in awhile". After an argument he has sometimes said "so what do *they* think you should do". :>

We talk about you guys as if....you are our best buddies and neighbors.

[DCJenn]

My husband was amusesd at first. Now, he knows better.

I refer to the people here as my friends. I use this site for work questions as well. What better resource to use than an bunch of handy docs. and people have been able to ask questions of my husband as well.

(although in all seriousness, may none of you ever need a Child Neurologist...)

jenn

[SuzySunshine]

Abigail, DH and I had the same concerns when I started posting here. I'm pretty open about where I'm located and the program but then again I don't have a lot of negative to say about ours either.

DH definitely doesn't know my login and password though.