punctual?

[JaneDoe]

I would like to know, as a frequent party host, why it is considered rude to be on time to a party?

I hate it when I am waiting for guests to arrive. It's annoying. I said 6:00, and I meant 6:00! When I am invited to a party, I have always been on time and found it incredibly awkward because we are the only guests there. It feels incredibly anxiety-inducing that I have to force myself to be late to a party. I feel awful if I am 15 minutes late to a party, much less 30 minutes, but I have been in the past only to STILL be the first one to arrive. What is up with that??

I totally agree with you!!! I don't get the fashionably late-thing either. When I've hosted get-togethers, I was sooo annoyed when people were late- sometimes as much as an hour without calling first. When I said a time, I meant it! Dh and I have also been on time to parties so that we're the first ones there. It is very awkward. It is just so ingrained in me to be on time that I just can't be late- even to a party. Ok . . I know I'm a dork.

[planet]

:guilty:

Notice my absence in this conversation too?

I like to be early, too, as others have said. It's just more relaxing that way. Dh is usually late.

[GrayMatterWife]

I find this thread ironic....medical spouses talking about punctuality when their SO's are in a profession that 98% of the time runs late.

Thanks for the good laugh!

I'm late to parties (but you shouldn't be right on time for those anyway, that's rude IMHO)

I don't understand this either....if I am having a party at X time, you show up at Y time, you aren't getting any of the good chips and dip.
I agree with Heidi, it just turns up the anxiety if you are hosting many or unfamiliar folks...as is typical with medical gatherings.

I think it may be considered by some to be rude to show up on time for dinner parties because if you do show up on time, both members of the couple are palpably, detectably pissed off and no one else at the party wants to be near them. Bearing total hatred for each other is the only possible way a couple could arrive on time. The always-on-time person has been yelling at the never-on-time person to GOGOGOGOGOGO!! for at least a half-an-hour before the actual departure time, resulting in the always-on-time person being pissed off for having to yell and the never-on-time person being pissed off at being yelled at. This usually results in a huge fight in the car on the drive to the party, where the anger often is exacerbated by the fact that never-on-time was supposed to bring the directions and map, but forgot. So always-on-time is now doubly mad at the prospect of being both late and disorganized (note that timely and organized, as traits, often go together). When the couple finally gets to the party (and, by a miracle that defies all known laws of physics, are actually on time), they are barely speaking and can't summon up the social grace to suppress the hostility for the comfort of those around them. As a result, other party guests are left to make awkward jokes and offer them alcohol (not out of politeness, but out of sheer hope that getting them tipsy will alleviate the situation), in an effort to avoid a nearly divorce-causing blow-up.

Therefore, it is considered polite for couples to be late to dinner parties. It spares everyone else at the party the headache of having to endure the result of what it would actually take to get the couple there on time.

[MDPhDWife]

I think it may be considered by some to be rude to show up on time for dinner parties because if you do show up on time, both members of the couple are pallably, detectably pissed off and no one else at the party wants to be near them. Bearing total hatred for each other is the only possible way a couple could arrive on time. The always-on-time person has been yelling at the never-on-time person to GOGOGOGOGOGO!! for at least a half-an-hour before the actual departure time, resulting in the always-on-time person being pissed off for having to yell and the never-on-time person being pissed off at being yelled at. This usually results in a huge fight in the car on the drive to the party, where the anger often is exacerbated by the fact that never-on-time was supposed to bring the directions and map, but forgot. So always-on-time is now doubly mad at the prospect of being both late and disorganized (note that timely and organized, as traits, often go together). When the couple finally gets to the party (and, by a miracle that defies all known laws of physics, are actually on time), they are barely speaking and can't summon up the social grace to suppress the hostility for the comfort of those around them. As a result, other party guests are left to make awkward jokes and offer them alcohol (not out of politeness, but out of sheer hope that getting them tipsy will alleviate the situation), in an effort to avoid a nearly divorce-causing blow-up.

Therefore, it is considered polite for couples to be late to dinner parties. It spares everyone else at the party the headache of having to endure the result of what it would actually take to get the couple there on time.

Abigail, I think you're onto something! I know this story sounds awfully familiar!

[Meenah]

I think it may be considered by some to be rude to show up on time for dinner parties because if you do show up on time, both members of the couple are pallably, detectably pissed off and no one else at the party wants to be near them. Bearing total hatred for each other is the only possible way a couple could arrive on time. The always-on-time person has been yelling at the never-on-time person to GOGOGOGOGOGO!! for at least a half-an-hour before the actual departure time, resulting in the always-on-time person being pissed off for having to yell and the never-on-time person being pissed off at being yelled at. This usually results in a huge fight in the car on the drive to the party, where the anger often is exacerbated by the fact that never-on-time was supposed to bring the directions and map, but forgot. So always-on-time is now doubly mad at the prospect of being both late and disorganized (note that timely and organized, as traits, often go together). When the couple finally gets to the party (and, by a miracle that defies all known laws of physics, are actually on time), they are barely speaking and can't summon up the social grace to suppress the hostility for the comfort of those around them. As a result, other party guests are left to make awkward jokes and offer them alcohol (not out of politeness, but out of sheer hope that getting them tipsy will alleviate the situation), in an effort to avoid a nearly divorce-causing blow-up.

Therefore, it is considered polite for couples to be late to dinner parties. It spares everyone else at the party the headache of having to endure the result of what it would actually take to get the couple there on time.
_________________

--Abigail

[Mrs. McPads]

I am always on time. Fiance is ALWAYS late. Makes for some fun to watch antics as I stand at the door waiting for him and he says he is ready, then sits down to check his email, eat a snack, play video games or otherwise do whatever he can do to AVOID being anywhere NEAR on time!!!!

Eileen