Originally posted by spedteacher
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My husband is leaving in less than 2 weeks to apart from me and our son for 16 months. I sure hope its do-able! If he gets a residency that is not in our area, I will stay behind until I find a job in the new location. I financially support our family. Residency pay will not pay our giant debt bills. I will, however, move as soon as I find a job, even if it doesn't pay as much as I make now.
Lacy
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DH moves in mid-June. I will definitely lag behind to finish the school year here anyway..but we'll see what happens after that.
Lacy-How far away with your husband be for school? I commend you for being financially resposible. I too support out family but then again we do not have children yet. (Hoping to some time soon!) How often do you think you will see your husband once hr begins?
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Originally posted by Vanquisher View PostI have been living apart from my husband for complicated reasons for 8 months, and it SUCKS. Avoid it, if at all possible. To me, it is just not worth it, and in hindsight, I wish we had done things differently.
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Originally posted by spedteacher View PostIs there an end in sight to you living apart? You know what they say "Hind sight is always 20/20." I am sure you are making it work the best you can. I really dont want to "regret" anything, so I am determined whatever we choose to do, we only look ahead and make the most of it.Heidi, PA-S1 - wife to an orthopaedic surgeon, mom to Ryan, 17, and Alexia, 11.
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We were apart for most of the time we dated. We got married, then a few years later I got a job that required weekly travel. Then we were together. Then he was deployed for seven months. Then we were together. Now he's heading to DC for a year while I stay here in Texas. I'm kind of over the romantic reasons why it's so lovely to be together. The number one reason why it's good to be together is because it's one hell of a lot easier to split the crap that has to be done. or even if 'split' is not exactly correct, it's a lot easier to say "you make dinner, I'm done."
Love is grand. But having someone around to take out the garbage is better. Being apart is FINE. It's doable, workable and some days even preferable. But generally, it's nicer to be together than to be apart.
Jenn
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Originally posted by Vanquisher View PostWe should be finished with living apart at the beginning of July. For me, I think I would regret time apart from my family more than I would regret a missed job opportunity. I am filled with regrets though.
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I guess I never really saw staying behind as an option when we moved last year for residency. We were long distance all throughout dating, but once we were married I think we really both saw ouselves as a unit. Different people, different situations, different places...there are too many variables to say what works for one will work for another. I will share this...that as hard as it to pack up and go, it is also an adventure together in a new place. I have really enjoyed the process of moving and "starting over" together. It also gives you a chance to discover your new town together and make friends together.
One more thing.... this is going to be a tough year for him. Not that should give up on what you want forever, or that his job is more important but this one of the most trying times he will probably need you to be there with him. I know my dh was grateful that I was here to help with this career transition/ move, and now that we are settled he is really helping me out with a career transition of my own. I am always a fan of being eachothers support system and it is just harder to do when you are further away....not to say that it can't be done
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