cupcake affair

[Michele]

Zoe, I hope I didn't upset you by my thread in the debate forum. I wasn't sure how to respond here, but I wanted to hear what everyone thought. I get what you are saying and understand where your frustration came from.

[weeniegeniewife]

..

[TigerLily]

You didn't upset me at all Michele! I didn't mean to give that impression. I love to see what everyone else thinks about it.

[v-girl]

Honestly, I wouldn't have thought twice about it. When I worked, I was the baker who got favors from the IT dept (or a specific IT person) by baking them brownies, cookies, a cake, etc. And would bake a birthday cake for any co-worker who requested a homemade cake.

Oh, and our neighbor has been known to come across the street and mow our lawn for us. Usually when he noticed DH's car gone for long periods of time or if he was just mowing his and had time to do another yard. We did start paying him in the spring when he turned it into a way to make a little money while he was unemployed.

That really stinks that you brought the cupcakes up there and she beat you to it
I know what you mean about just wanting something to be yours seeing as the hospital and residency have taken over EVERY other aspect of your guys' life!!
I hope you guys are able to celebrate on a day that he has "off"!!
I would have been really upset too.

[Tenacious_D]

I get upset when mil dies stuff like that and doesn't tell me ahead of time so I would be a little perturbed if a lone nurse tech or resident did that. If a group does it then fine. I will say that at the end of internship, dh came home with a T-shirt from a nurse that she designed with her bf...we assumed all the interns got one. Dh and one other guy were the only ones who got it because this nurse really liked the two of them. That didn't bother me so much...probably because she was 60+ and the shirt was hysterical!

[diggitydot]

Cassy -- until residency I was 100% in the same camp. It wasn't until we relocated here to a much smaller community did the "hunting" become really obvious. I've been around docs and clinics my entire life and this is the first time I've ever noticed it. It's so weird.

[Michele]

Cassy, in ophtho most aren't nurses...they are techs and the level of training isn't the same, so i think it might attract a different subset. Also the biggest "hunters" were at the optometry places where he moonlighted, but the nympho tat girl was at the university clinic.

[MrsK]

Funny, I used to see lawyer hunters too. The secretaries would show up at Bar events dressed like sluts and giggle in the ladies room about catching a lawyer. I always wondere why someone who worked with lawyers would be interested in dating one.

[diggitydot]

That was always my take on peeps who work with docs. They have GOT to see he crapfest involved.

[scrub-jay]

One thing I would definitely do just automatically is make sure to find the nurse/tech that gave him the brownies for his birthday and thank her for her kindness. By acting like it was a nice thing to do for both your dh AND yourself you address two potential situations: 1)kindly nurse looking out for doctor is thanked by doctor's loving wife for doing something genuinely kind OR 2)nurse looking for more than friendship from doctor is given the message that said doctor tells his loving wife EVERYTHING and she has been identified as someone to keep an eye on. Of course, I'd give the staff member the benefit of the doubt. But, it doesn't hurt to go and thank the nurse who did this (and, like many things I do it does kill two birds with one stone ).

Just call me Ms. Devious. Always kill them with kindness - until you have to bite.

Rapunzel - you are brilliant. Forget Miss Manners... I want to read "Ms. Devious" advice.

Funny, I used to see lawyer hunters too. The secretaries would show up at Bar events dressed like sluts and giggle in the ladies room about catching a lawyer. I always wondere why someone who worked with lawyers would be interested in dating one.

Amen sister...! These people should know better!

[peggyfromwastate]

hmmm, just now reading the cupcake thread.

DH has brought home all sorts of stuff from one particular nurse that thinks he's awesome. I didn't even ask what she looks like. She sends us home FOOD lol. Seriously DH once mentioned that she's an "older lady" who likes to bake. It didn't even occur to me to be jealous at the time. I'm not very protective I guess...

I'd say that my Dad in his 30 year career was hit on by patients far more than the staff. But pretty much being hit on is part of being a doctor. Some people go for the White Coat like others go for the Uniform (DCJenn I'm thinking of you!).

As far as the topic of the OP, I don't think I'd be annoyed. I think my DH would handle it like weeniegenie's did, too. But it's never a bad idea to have The Talk with one's spouse about what you're comfort with. I know I wouldn't be able to handle any flirting between DH and other women. I have a low threshold for that kind of stuff. Plus I think it's generally unprofessional. He does too, so we're squared away.

[Thirteen]

I think we're fortunate, in that our res program is incredibly family-friendly. I know all the SOs/DHs/DWs in 2nd and 3rd yr, as well as most of the clinic staff and nurses. When we started, I used to bake goodies for the office, and DH buys lunch (pizza) for everyone at the place he moonlights.
The only person who's ever made a pass at him is a regular patient: she's 68 and just LOVES him.
I treat the staff with kindness when I see them, and I know their names. Now that we're pregnant, I see everyone 1x a month, and they always ask me about Bean.
It's a good fit, and I'm happy --

[weeniegeniewife]

We both know that we will always "dine at home" so who cares if someone flirts?

DH likes to quote Paul Newman: "Why eat hamburger when I can have steak at home?".