What do you do...

[SoonerTexan]

It's not really that hard for us right now. I'll let you know in 1 year when he starts 3rd and we have a 6 month old!

But

sitting next to each other during Mass

We try and make sure to hit the same mass time--really important to me.

I'll occasionally bring him something, like his fav cupcake from a local bakery.

I've been trying to study with him more. Half the time I can barely figure out what to ask and pronounce things wrong, but he says it helps, makes him laugh, and I actually learn a thing or two here and there!

[Pollyanna]

We try and make sure to hit the same mass time--really important to me.

When baby comes make sure you still sit next to each other. Our kiddos know that mom and dad always sit next to each other kids do not sit in between. Of course we may only make it through the first ten minutes of Mass before one of us is heading to the cry room but even those few minutes make a huge difference to us.

[SoonerTexan]

When baby comes make sure you still sit next to each other. Our kiddos know that mom and dad always sit next to each other kids do not sit in between. Of course we may only make it through the first ten minutes of Mass before one of us is heading to the cry room but even those few minutes make a huge difference to us.

We will...my parents always did this and it kind of bothers me when we go to mass with the in-laws and they usually don't. I feel like I'm intruding or something!

[charispina]

What I do to help him feel connected is I listen to him talk about work. He needs to get it out of his system but I have to draw him out. If I didn't ask him questions he'd just study the whole time he is home.

He doesn't do much to connect to me as a person tbh. Hopefully this will change when he's done withtraining but it's an issue that really brings me down about once every2 months. I feel burdened to carry all the family activities, keep the house running, be dhs therapist, and try to keep some semblance of a relationship going... I love him but I can't stand being taken for granted and often btwn him and the kids I just feel like I'm spinning my wheels in life.

This is exactly how I feel, but it's been bringing me down about every day I feel like the harder I try to be the dutiful cheerleader the more I end up just feeling ignored. Just another piece of furniture.

And sex? Um, not really happening - I bought $400 worth of new lingerie and he hasn't even noticed. The last time it happened I literally had to talk him into it, and we had barely finished before he said "Ok, I need to shower and go to bed." No cuddling. Not even an effing good night kiss.

I know he's tired, but COME ON. This is my life, too.

Ok, I guess that was kind of a vent, but I'm sitting in the living room alone watching Kate Plus 8 after sneaking out of bed fresh from a rejection. I'm a little bummed out. Blah.

[v-girl]

Ok, I guess that was kind of a vent, but I'm sitting in the living room alone watching Kate Plus 8 after sneaking out of bed fresh from a rejection. I'm a little bummed out. Blah.

This was us during 3rd year of med school and 2nd year of med school. Sucked. We're better now, but it was a rocky road. I actually made/begged/forced him to attend a church retreat during his weekend off in the middle of a night float rotation. Things got better.

We're here for you.

[diggitydot]

Does he know how you feel about this? Some dudes have seriously thick skulls and need shit spelled out in excruciating detail. There has been more than once when I've had to sit my dude down and tell him, "Look, I love you, but I kinda feel like an afterthought (moreso than usual) and I don't like it. Something is up. Spill it."

Most of the time he doesn't realize that it affects us around him when he gets like that and occasionally needs a reminder that it's OK to share whatever is churning up in his noggin or get the fuck over himself because there are other people on this planet who don't want to deal with his moody ass.



Hang in there.