Friends,
I have been meaning to come on here and post, but due to my hectic work/school schedule I have not been able to
So, J(my boyfriend) and I had a tiff a couple weeks back and it has been bothering me since.. and I would like some advice..
So here it goes..
J (my boyfriend) called me a couple weeks back because his brother and his wife had a baby. J told me and I honestly thought it was nice but didn't comment much on the matter...he seemed annoyed because I wasn't jumping for joy.. and he asked me if I was jealous of his sister-in-law... and it kind of pissed me off, because I am not jealous of her.. I just don't care much about her (I have valid reasons for my feelings which I will explain). I told him that I was indifferent towards her and was glad that the baby was healthy, but I couldn't comment much.. because I don't really care (now that I realize it...the comment seems kinda bitchy, but I was honest)
I wasn't trying to seem hateful towards the child or his brother, but his argument was that my distaste for this woman was permeating to the rest of his family like his brother and his new baby... and I can understand how he feels that way, but I don't dislike his brother or the baby.. I just don't like his sister-in law.. anyway
So J's sister in-law has never been nice to me... EVER.. and at first I thought that maybe I had to prove myself or something, but every time I have ever interacted with this woman she has aways had something mean to say (she has a domineering, bully, a**hole personality.. You can tell that she wears the pants in her marriage). The first time I ever met her she ridiculed the way me and J met (we met online), my 1st X-mas with J and his whole family she tried to make me look bad in front of his sisters and mother, she has instigated via e-mail and social networking that J didn't visit the rest of his family b/c of me.
Now every time these things have happened I have always kept my mouth shut.. and taken the humble route. I like to think that I am the type of person who gives people the benefit of the doubt, but honestly after having such horrible experiences with her I honestly don't want anything to do with her... I really don't like her.. And even despite the fact that I don't like her every time I do have to see her I am always respectful..
J's comment (and everyone in his family apparently) is that she is this way and that there is nothing that anyone can do about it. So I am thinking to myself.. Do I really have to always put my head down when I am being subtly insulted? Or am I being too sensitive?
I believe that I have every right to not like her.. However, I have been very careful around his family because in all honesty I like his sisters and mother but she is just a bi**h.
J also says that he cannot do anything because that is his brothers wife...
So what would you do? J comes back from med school in a month and I know I will have to see her ALLL THE TIME.. luckily, I am busy enough to stay away, but I am absolutely dreading christmas and new years...
I talked to my mother about the situation and she said that I should try to just ignore her comments.. J and I would like to get married someday, but ever since this I view marriage a bit differently.... I've realized that marriage isn't about you and your partner, but also everyone else directly related to you and him... I even had a thought like.. Do I want to be marry into a family who just lets people openly insult each other and excuse the behavior..?!?! Sometimes I feel kinda crazy even thinking of this...
I love J very much... but sometimes the fact that I would have to see this woman ALWAYS gives me nausea...
Am I being a drama queen?!?!?!
I NEED ADVICE....
I have been meaning to come on here and post, but due to my hectic work/school schedule I have not been able to
So, J(my boyfriend) and I had a tiff a couple weeks back and it has been bothering me since.. and I would like some advice..
So here it goes..
J (my boyfriend) called me a couple weeks back because his brother and his wife had a baby. J told me and I honestly thought it was nice but didn't comment much on the matter...he seemed annoyed because I wasn't jumping for joy.. and he asked me if I was jealous of his sister-in-law... and it kind of pissed me off, because I am not jealous of her.. I just don't care much about her (I have valid reasons for my feelings which I will explain). I told him that I was indifferent towards her and was glad that the baby was healthy, but I couldn't comment much.. because I don't really care (now that I realize it...the comment seems kinda bitchy, but I was honest)
I wasn't trying to seem hateful towards the child or his brother, but his argument was that my distaste for this woman was permeating to the rest of his family like his brother and his new baby... and I can understand how he feels that way, but I don't dislike his brother or the baby.. I just don't like his sister-in law.. anyway
So J's sister in-law has never been nice to me... EVER.. and at first I thought that maybe I had to prove myself or something, but every time I have ever interacted with this woman she has aways had something mean to say (she has a domineering, bully, a**hole personality.. You can tell that she wears the pants in her marriage). The first time I ever met her she ridiculed the way me and J met (we met online), my 1st X-mas with J and his whole family she tried to make me look bad in front of his sisters and mother, she has instigated via e-mail and social networking that J didn't visit the rest of his family b/c of me.
Now every time these things have happened I have always kept my mouth shut.. and taken the humble route. I like to think that I am the type of person who gives people the benefit of the doubt, but honestly after having such horrible experiences with her I honestly don't want anything to do with her... I really don't like her.. And even despite the fact that I don't like her every time I do have to see her I am always respectful..
J's comment (and everyone in his family apparently) is that she is this way and that there is nothing that anyone can do about it. So I am thinking to myself.. Do I really have to always put my head down when I am being subtly insulted? Or am I being too sensitive?
I believe that I have every right to not like her.. However, I have been very careful around his family because in all honesty I like his sisters and mother but she is just a bi**h.
J also says that he cannot do anything because that is his brothers wife...
So what would you do? J comes back from med school in a month and I know I will have to see her ALLL THE TIME.. luckily, I am busy enough to stay away, but I am absolutely dreading christmas and new years...
I talked to my mother about the situation and she said that I should try to just ignore her comments.. J and I would like to get married someday, but ever since this I view marriage a bit differently.... I've realized that marriage isn't about you and your partner, but also everyone else directly related to you and him... I even had a thought like.. Do I want to be marry into a family who just lets people openly insult each other and excuse the behavior..?!?! Sometimes I feel kinda crazy even thinking of this...
I love J very much... but sometimes the fact that I would have to see this woman ALWAYS gives me nausea...
Am I being a drama queen?!?!?!
I NEED ADVICE....
Comment