Your role as automatic "test subject" and live-in standardized patient

[bobk]

I never knew whether being asked to remove my shirt was the foreplay or the beginning of a medical exam.

Why does it have to be one or the other? Did you ever try role playing?

[MsSassyBaskets]

DH was using me as a practice dummy last night to practice for his clinical skills exam he has today. He performed an entire 1.5 hour set of comprehensive skills from the multi-page list of skills he may be tested on.

As I was being mercilessly poked and prodded, my knees being manipulated in such a way that they produced the "pop" he was looking for ("did you feel that pop?" "yes, it doesn't feel great. please stop" "oh, yeah, it's not supposed to feel good"), I reflected on how, in our short time in medical school, I have already been reduced to tears on multiple occasions while he tests things out on me.

My favorite: as he used my bare chest and abdomen to practice percussion sounds, he also looked for my liver. Since he had just learned this the same day, he started pressing down just a little too far north of where he was supposed to, jabbing me in a tender part of my ribs. When I yelped in pain and exclaimed that: "you're poking my rib, stop! It hurts!!", he scoffed and said "I'm not on your ribs". I continued to squirm in pain and he looks at me with both concern and an air of knowing and said "your liver is both enlarged and painful. Get dressed, we probably need to take you to the ED. This is not good". I told him "no, seriously, those are my ribs. You're poking my ribs." He had me lay back down and tried again. Miraculously, he then poked around in the correct area, found my actual liver and didn't poke my ribs. He left me with a tender spot on my ribs for the next couple days, but to this day maintains he "knew it was my ribs" the whole time. Right...that's why I was almost rushed to the hospital.

And second, he recently listened to my heart sounds and gleefully exclaimed I have a "benign systolic hear murmur". I burst into tears. I mean literally...burst into tears, crying "I don't want to have a heart murmur! How could no one have told me this before?" It was a good lesson for him in that: a) you can't look excited to hear something in an actual human that you've only heard in a recording when it's clearly something that might concern the patient and b) not everyone knows that "benign systolic heart murmur" means both "pretty common" and "not a big deal". The best part? A couple hours later he listened again and said..."wait, I actually don't think you have a heart murmur".

What have you been subjected to?

Ohh, I'm so sorry but you made me LOL. I'm always the test subject for DH, especially the night before a History/Physical test. I have had every H&P series about 10 times over. I usually arm myself with an extremely large glass of wine before we get started, and then I give him all the cooperation of a ragdoll. Mine's a DO student so I get the OMT part as well, which I enjoy, at least when it comes to cracking my eternally out-of-whack upper back.

[SoonerTexan]

Why does it have to be one or the other? Did you ever try role playing?

I tried a few times. He actually has had a patient hit on him, though, and it wasn't a positive experience. LOL

I will say that I'm wayyyy more willing to be the test dummy for other med students than I was at the beginning of med school. Our Ped has med students from DH's school rotate through and they know DH is an MS3 so almost every time we go to the ped N gets an extra exam by a med student. I don't mind at all now.

[medpedspouse]

It's funny this comes up today, as I'm wearing a "bracelet" of purple suture around my wrist from where she was practicing her knots last night.

I offered to let her test her stitching too, so as to spare the poor sponge, but she didn't take me up on it.

Tell her to try chicken breasts - or pigs feet (if you want to go to that trouble) for practicing sutures.

[reciprocity]

Oh good tip! I think my butcher sells pigs ears those would work pretty well I imagine...

[corn poffi]

I just received the 2013 "Bio Corporation" catalog at work. If anybody needs animal products, they're running a special: 10 free sheep eyes with a $250 purchase.

Yeah. My job is weird.

[Ladybug]

DH has always volunteered to do my breast self exams since his surgery practice involves a breast cancer population he usually ends up quite...distracted
I've had him check my thyroid (endocrine surgeon) when I'm feeling all wonky. So far so good.
I missed the basics of med school so I've found his specialized clinical knowledge more useful.

[GreyhoundsRUs]

I was thankfully spared, but BIL (his bro) was the pt for his whole study group to practice the physical exam on

[L.Jane]

J and I met fourth year, so I missed a lot of that, but when he was studying for a step exam he had me pretend to be some of the patients. One of the scenarios read that that patient was a unhappy petulant teenage boy. Apparently I played the part too well and DH got annoyed. I had to remind him that he was possibly going to run into problems like that and I didn't think it was professional to tell the patient off.

[WolfpackWife]

DH has always volunteered to do my breast self exams since his surgery practice involves a breast cancer population .

See? That's helpful! I am the WORST about doing them and told DH I just flat-out won't...I don't like to press on them and it gives me anxiety. He said he'd do it but I think he has ulterior motives...