I'm an introvert and I own it

[WolfpackWife]

I actually just took this test recently! I feel like I identify more with being an introvert, but I was surprised to find I was pretty right down the middle between introvert and extrovert. I find it easy and nonthreatening to be in social situations, and definitely go through periods of time where I am ready and raring to go out and be with friends and DO ALL THE THINGS. But usually, I prefer to decompress quietly, by myself or with DH, etc. I think I definitely can possess extroverted tendencies if needed or when I want to, but at heart I know I'm an introvert.

[Curegirl]

With all the introverts here I'm beginning to think the "i" in iMSN stands for introverted

[Auspicious]

Another super-introvert here. And another one who's glad this is a place where most understand what that means and doesn't mean. I like socializing but if I look on the calendar and see too many events stacked up in the same weekend, I feel a bit anxious. Or if I hang out with people and really enjoy it, but then they want to get together again too soon for me, I feel kind of like "but . . . but . . . I'm still all talked out!"

To answer the original question, one of the things I like about being an introvert is that I feel somewhat inoculated against loneliness, and therefore some of the unwise decisions people make out of fear of loneliness. Like I've never kept a bad boyfriend around for too long for fear of being alone, or struggled with toxic friendships. Just this week my five-year-old was asking me if I was lonely before I met Daddy (OMG the questions from her, you guys!), and I told her, no, I was happiER after meeting Daddy, but I was happy before I met him too. And a whole discussion about how it's better to be single than be with the wrong person, and what if when Daddy came along I was already with someone else who was wrong for me, just because I thought I had to have a boyfriend all the time? (Extroverts can use different means to get to the same end, of course.)

Least favorite part of being an introvert is of course that our society is not built for introverts. Extroversion is preferred.

As for the family angle, to me having infants was great as an introvert. You always have your little buddy with you, but they aren't demanding, say, small talk or personal validation. (I am the type of introvert who likes stuff going on around me, without demanding too much of certain kinds of interaction. Hence, eight years in NYC.) Then that kind of flip-flopped and the toddler years were really hard in that respect. Little bottomless pits of needing interaction! "List eight reasons I can't climb this cabinet! Explain an inane thing to me over and over! Why are you going into the bathroom--I'm coming with!" Now I'm enjoying this late-preschool, early-elementary time. They can occupy themselves and each other for periods of time but will be back and forth to me to ask me things or have me help them with something, but it's not relentless. I'm wanting to get into more drop-off playdates here, with kids running around the house doing their thing, with partial supervision by me and just a few minutes of chitchat with the parent at pickup (nice parents here, generally). I like having them and their friends around, but also want to think my own thoughts sometimes, too.

[Sheherezade]

Introvert here, as well. Some of the most "extroverted" people I know have revealed to me that they test as introverts. It's funny. I can absolutely work a room, give a speech (won contests for that in HS), hold a big party, etc. but if asked what I prefer it's definitely me and maybe a few friends only getting together. I have to prep my energy for a big event and if too many string together, I'm a mess and take several days of alone time to recover. I get stressed by heavy socializing.

In contrast, my most extroverted friend starts to get itchy if she hasn't been with people for awhile. She calls around for contact -- and she's at events every stinking weekend. She's always asking me what I'm doing for the weekend and I think she feels genuinely sorry for me when I say "nothing" when in reality, that's a big Wahoo! moment in this family. We love a lot of "nothing" on the calendar.

[Thirteen]

I always thought I was an extrovert, because I do talk a lot.

Problem is, I always feel exhausted after an hour or two in a social setting, and want to leave.
I never put two and two together until after college -- things like dinners, house parties, rush, etc. are somewhat stressful for me because I am not good at small talk in large groups. A smaller group in a more intimate setting (6-8 max) where I know at least 2-3 people prior to is the most ideal for me.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - now Free

[HouseofWool]

I always thought I was an extrovert, because I do talk a lot.

Problem is, I always feel exhausted after an hour or two in a social setting, and want to leave.
I never put two and two together until after college -- things like dinners, house parties, rush, etc. are somewhat stressful for me because I am not good at small talk in large groups. A smaller group in a more intimate setting (6-8 max) where I know at least 2-3 people prior to is the most ideal for me.

You are smarter than I am. It took me until about a year ago to figure this out... My ideal social situation is one where I know at least a couple of people well. For example, 2 weeks ago I went on an outing with 200 people. Other moms from school where going, so I knew that there would be friendly faces there, and C's teacher was there as well. A good chunk of the evening I felt like a wallflower because the other people are better friends with each other. I definitely prefer small group interactions.

[samssugarmomma]

I'm also an introvert and right one 3/4 of my kids are extroverts. I know that dd1 is an extrovert and dd2 is an introvert. At 3 and 1 year I think dd3 and dd4 are too young to tell. Or extroverts ..... They are just so darn needy it is hard to tell!

Needing time to recharge and having such needy kids has contributed A LOT to my unhappiness in this lifestyle. I need a good hour or two each night alone and that just doesn't happen ...... so I constantly feel like I have nothing left to give. After several days being "on" 24x7 I need a full day alone to recover. It makes me sad cause I feel abnormal and like a bad person/ mother.

I just signed my 1 year old up for preschool/daycare 2 days a week so I'm hoping that helps.

[houseelf]

I'm definitely an 'e' but I've creep closer to 'i' every year. In fact, almost all of my scores (ENFJ) crept closer to the middle. I definitely need more time to recharge now and take my time to contemplate things now that I'm older. Owning my 'e' means that I will probably go back to work eventually for the social contact. I crave it. I know if I'm ever left alone, I'm definitely the type to move into a retirement community. Maybe after the commune we can start a Golden Girls retirement village somewhere down in Boca Raton.

I have to say that I adore the 'i's in my life and I have far more 'i' friends and loved ones than I do 'e'. Until I understood what 'i" meant I couldn't believe it when my 'i' friends told me they were 'i'. I was like, "Get out, we talk for days on end". Then we'd go out to a group setting and the entire dynamic would change.

[weeniegeniewife]

I'm an introvert and I love it and wear the badge proudly. You'd never know it if you met me at a party, because I love meeting new people and chatting and being social. But to recharge my batteries, I MUST have my alone time.

So many people misunderstand introversion; people think that it means you're shy or antisocial. Not true. I encourage my introverted clients to read "The Introvert Advantage" or "Quiet." Both are great books.

Introverts feel pressure to not be introverted, because we live in a very extroverted world. I wish that introverts could embrace their introversion instead of feeling like they have to change who they are. I flove being an introvert. It's so great to be able to say to friends and family: "Love you all, but I've filled my social quota for the (day, month, year, whatever), so I'm outta here." And they get it and understand.

[ladymoreta]

Happy introvert here. I haven't really noticed a lot of pressure to be more extroverted or judgement for being introverted.

[Vishenka69]

Pretty much.

It is funny, DS is fairly introverted and is a relatively quiet child. DD? She talks even in her sleep sometimes. I relish it when she is gone because I feel like all of my nerve endings are exposed by the end of the day with her.

Mine are exactly the same.

I'm totally an I and DH is E but most friends think it's the other way around.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk 4

[Vishenka69]

Another super-introvert here. And another one who's glad this is a place where most understand what that means and doesn't mean. I like socializing but if I look on the calendar and see too many events stacked up in the same weekend, I feel a bit anxious. Or if I hang out with people and really enjoy it, but then they want to get together again too soon for me, I feel kind of like "but . . . but . . . I'm still all talked out!"

To answer the original question, one of the things I like about being an introvert is that I feel somewhat inoculated against loneliness, and therefore some of the unwise decisions people make out of fear of loneliness. Like I've never kept a bad boyfriend around for too long for fear of being alone, or struggled with toxic friendships. Just this week my five-year-old was asking me if I was lonely before I met Daddy (OMG the questions from her, you guys!), and I told her, no, I was happiER after meeting Daddy, but I was happy before I met him too. And a whole discussion about how it's better to be single than be with the wrong person, and what if when Daddy came along I was already with someone else who was wrong for me, just because I thought I had to have a boyfriend all the time? (Extroverts can use different means to get to the same end, of course.)

Least favorite part of being an introvert is of course that our society is not built for introverts. Extroversion is preferred.

As for the family angle, to me having infants was great as an introvert. You always have your little buddy with you, but they aren't demanding, say, small talk or personal validation. (I am the type of introvert who likes stuff going on around me, without demanding too much of certain kinds of interaction. Hence, eight years in NYC.) Then that kind of flip-flopped and the toddler years were really hard in that respect. Little bottomless pits of needing interaction! "List eight reasons I can't climb this cabinet! Explain an inane thing to me over and over! Why are you going into the bathroom--I'm coming with!" Now I'm enjoying this late-preschool, early-elementary time. They can occupy themselves and each other for periods of time but will be back and forth to me to ask me things or have me help them with something, but it's not relentless. I'm wanting to get into more drop-off playdates here, with kids running around the house doing their thing, with partial supervision by me and just a few minutes of chitchat with the parent at pickup (nice parents here, generally). I like having them and their friends around, but also want to think my own thoughts sometimes, too.

That pretty much describes me. Got nothing to add.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk 4

[MrsC]

I'm very introverted too. I also have a far better understanding of it after reading 'Quiet'. I felt like everything suddenly clicked after reading it. It also goes into great detail about how from a young age everything revolves around being an extrovert. It was a real eye opener for DH too. He'd always considered himself an extrovert until he went through the checklist in that book. MIL and SIL are the only extroverts in our immediate families. We both need to recharge after a weekend with them.

[MsSassyBaskets]

Super-introvert here, and totally fine with it. I do well in small social groups, and even at large parties if I have a small group of people to "attach" to, and I can enjoy it but I also find it exhausting. I think I come across as fairly confident, although I don't exactly love doing presentations or speaking in front of groups. I just got home from a mega road trip in which we saw probably 30+ friends and family, and now I don't want to leave the house for a week. Give me a good book, my DH and cats, my comfy couch, and Netflix, and I will be so happy for the next few days.

My favorite part about being introverted is finding pleasure in the small things and feeling like my world can be rich without a lot of fuss. I can get a lot of satisfaction out of a good book or a quiet walk. I can also get a lot of "mental work" done when I'm on my own -- I can mull over a writing project for work/school/personal and it all comes together in my head before I even have to sit down and do any "real" work. In everyday life I am constantly imagining, thinking, planning things, and then when it's time to do any kind of project I know exactly how it's going to go. I think a lot of my organization, planning, and creativity come from being very internally-focused.

I find extroverts difficult to deal with when they put me on the spot or are overly direct, which I find rude, or when people I'm around require huge amounts of stimulation--loud conversation, loud music, stimulating locations, tons of people -- just to have fun. I hate being peer-pressured by an extrovert to stay out longer or come to an event/activity that I'm not interested in, because it feels like being "used" to recharge their batteries when it will only wear me out. It's a good thing I don't give a crap about impressing most people.

[DrBandMe]

I took a version of this not too long ago and scored as an extrovert but I'm questioning that a lot lately. I become over stimulated very quickly lately and spend most days at home with only the noise of cars passing outside. A day with friends is fun but I want to get home and curl up with some peace and quiet and a nap. *shrugs* Who knows.