Baby sleeping

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Ok, I'm seriously about to lose it you guys. For the third night in a row I'm sitting in the dark with Delia screaming bloody murder and not going to sleep.

We start the bedtime routine around 8ish with a bath but now she just screams and won't latch. We keep thinking maybe she's gassy but she won't burp. Eventually se exhausts herself and will nurse. She nurses for 5-10 minutes before falling asleep but when I go to lay her down (after holding her an additional 10 minutes or so to make sure she's asleep, she's up 3 minutes later if not instantaneously. She also won't go more than 2 hours without waking at night. I am about to lose it. Dh will help but we can't think of a solution. We have pumped milk but that doesn't solve her not sleeping and refusing to go down at night.

It's maddening because she'll fall asleep, she just won't stay that way. She's only 8 weeks so I'm trying to tell myself this will improve but there is no way I can function when I restart work in 4 weeks. Most evenings I will have to work after she's asleep and if that takes 2 hours and then she only sleeps in 2 hour chunks, I won't be able to survive.

During the day she happily sleeps in a carrier, on us, or in her car seat. At night we are using the pack and play and swaddling her. We have tried no swaddle but she wakes herself up with her arms. We have a white noise machine, etc. Anyway, that's all the stuff we've tried, can anyone help?

The not sleeping more than 2 hours is in the last 3 weeks and now the not going to sleep has been over the last few days.

[alison]

My main suggestion would be to start the bedtime routine much earlier, 6:00-6:30. Tomorrow, try 7:45, Friday at 7:30, etc. in 15 minute increments until you get down to 6:30 or so. I think now'a a good time to start a bath and bedtime routine. Even though she's up every few hours, I'd still move that bedtime a couple of hours earlier.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

My main suggestion would be to start the bedtime routine much earlier, 6:00-6:30. Tomorrow, try 7:45, Friday at 7:30, etc. in 15 minute increments until you get down to 6:30 or so. I think now'a a good time to start a bath and bedtime routine. Even though she's up every few hours, I'd still move that bedtime a couple of hours earlier.

Is that because she's getting overtired? She sleeps a lot during the day even when we try to keep her awake.

[Thirteen]

She's 8 weeks? This is possibly one of her big growth spurt times. When she did her 4 week spurt, how long was her behavior altered?
The good news is, if it is a growth spurt (and that's a huge possibility), it will pass. It seems like it won't (and this is coming from a mom who still struggles with bad growth spurt behavior), but it will.
HAVING SAID THAT ---

I want to say positive, helpful things... but I am not one to give sleep advice.
*Disclaimer: DS did not take a regular nap until he was 8 months old. He would wake up at least 3x a night (and then be awake by 4:45-5am) until 6 months. It was pure hell.

We: put him in the Ergo and went on "night hikes" until he would fall asleep and was VERY asleep (like 2 hour walks), drove around until he would fall asleep (and then some: 45 min - 1 hr), and would trade each other out for "walking/bouncing" time with the wakings.

Routines (unfortunately) didn't work for us, and it drove me to madness to try to get him down. He would typically crash at around 10:30-11:30pm at night when he was very small. I just finally made my peace with it, knowing that whenever he crashed would be my new bedtime.

I just want to affirm you. I'm so sorry this is happening right now. I really, really, REALLY get it.
*HUG*

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

I am so screwed if you're right Thirteen. Dh starts a gen surg intern year in July and I work 60 hours a week.

Her 4 week spurt lasted 2 days and he just nursed all the time. The crappy sleeping at night has been going on for too long to be a spurt. I just think she's a crappy sleeper. I apparently didn't sleep thru the night until 2.5 years. I'm screwed.

[alison]

Yes, exactly, my sense is she's overtired and too tired to even eat. . The good news is that it sounds like her sleep is starting to organize and by putting her down before she even has a chance to get overtired, she may sleep in longer stretches!

[alison]

We used to keep dd up, and go out and about like A to try to get her to fall asleep. She just wanted to go to bed early. We even started with her routine at 5:30 and she was in bed by 6! Who would have thought she wanted to go to bed that early??!

[TigerLily]

ugh, we've gone through similar things on and off since A was born. I know the feeling and it really is so terrible. It WILL get better, even though I know it doesn't feel like it.

[ladymoreta]

I think it sounds like reflux. If she sleeps well upright (in the carrier) or at an incline (carseat), the problem may be lying flat in the pack and play. Have you tried having her take naps in it, and if so, does she wake crying/screaming after about 30 minutes? (With DS, his naps were 30 minutes and night wakings were about 2 hours apart.)

You may not have to use medication; lots of babies outgrow reflux by 6 months. Until then, you might try elevating one end of the pack and play. (Can you do that? I have a crib wedge that goes under our crib mattress, but I don't know if there's a way to make the P&P inclined.) I put DS to sleep, even overnight, in his carseat. It's not as safe as a flat surface, but it would get me an occasional 3 or 4 hour stretch.

Then again, some babies are just bad sleepers. I think DS would have been even without the reflux. He had really strong separation anxiety way before and after most babies. It sucks, but your body will adjust. It's kind of funny - after awhile, I started only having REM sleep. When you start noticing that you're dreaming a lot, it's about to get better (even if her sleep doesn't).

[TigerLily]

It just occurred to me to mention reflux as well. A was a disaster until we gave her Zantac. Literally after her first dose she became a different baby.

[GreyhoundsRUs]

My first reaction is the same as LM. We put surgical texts under the wheeled side of the P&P. It didn't work for DD because she felt like she was falling...that's why she slept in her car seat until...last week

Thinking of you guys!

[Bittersweet]

Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. There's a reason sleep deprivation is considered a form of torture. It's so miserable. I'm in no position to give advice. My DS didn't start responding to a bedtime routine until about 6 months. Before that we were in survival mode and co-sleeping was the only way I could get enough sleep to function at work. You've gotten some good advice and it will get better (I promise). In the meantime, do whatever you need to take care of yourself.

[Pollyanna]

I agree about trying an earlier bedtime. 8pm is pretty late for an 8-week old. If changing the bedtime doesn't help I would check for reflux. Worst case scenario is a colicky baby. Our baby #5 used to scream (I mean full out scream, so loud you could not hear anything type of scream) from 8pm to 1am every. single. night. from about 6 weeks to 12 weeks (classic colic timing). Nothing made it better and nothing made it worse. It came on out of the blue and left the same way. Because it was our 5th baby it was physically exhausting but not as emotional as if it were our first. We basically just held her, loved her, and let her scream until she finally fell asleep in our arms. Dh and I got really good at watching things on TV that you didn't need sound (or we turned on closed captioning). TV is a must in every nursery IMHO.

Don't panic just yet though, its most likely that she is over tired and you will solve your problem right away. Hang in there mama

[SoonerTexan]

but now she just screams and won't latch.

Noelle has been doing this lately...when this happens I know it's time to shove the pacifier in her mouth and/or hand her over to daddy. Nursing just makes it worse. She fell asleep tonight sucking on the pacifier staring straight at my boobs. I don't understand it either...

ETA: You are trying to avoid the pacifier, right? If you can do it, more power to you, but jeez that thing really really really makes a difference sometimes and hasn't interfered with nursing at all (she spits it out right before she latches on!)

[MrsK]

I haven't read the responses to your original post so this may have been covered. She sounds like K1. He had his days and nightd confused. We have a friend who is a sleep psychiatrist. He and our peditrician helped us out.

First, the sleep psychiatrist said don't bother with a bedtime routine until they are 6mo. She's too young to get it and you won't spoil her.

Second, wake her every 2 hours during the day. Feed her, change her diaper, etc. And keep daytime active. Turn on the lights, take her out. This sucks when you have been up all night but I think it wasn't long to show K1 that daytime is a lot more interesting than nighttime.

Third, in the evening keep the house quiet. Dim the lights, turn off the tv, don't talk to her. The world has gone to bed and there us nothing to do but sleep. You may even want to give her the bath during the day if it over-stimulates her at night.

I'll post more if I remember more.