Available at 
Tweet
Re: For Peggy....
To be fair for those of you who are maybe a wee bit apprehensive about the storm to come that is called preteen/tween:
I'm sure that Luanne and Kris would agree that there are moments with a tweener that are nice and fun. Kate does tell me stuff, and she wants me to know all about her "crushes" and her friends. It's not all bad! I like to talk to her now about sex, drugs, etc because she really listens and seems to be open to my opinions. She also always wants to play a game, or to watch a movie. She's not too busy to hang out with me. I also like to tell her about her physiological changes (Wonder of Girls book is helpful here) and to empathize (yes, it is hard to grow up and deal with amazing hormonal surges). These are good relationship building years-- but they are also draining like I never ever expected. It is like living with a hurricane sometimes. OK- maybe that's not very reassuring, but...
Anyway...
It is really hard to let natural consequences come when it's something like homework. I do let her have natural consequences of a dirty room for the most part--- a major one last year was that she didn't get her clothes into the laundry--- she had a pile of dirty clothes in her room at all times. She didn't like it much when she ran out of underwear (
I know, ick) and so had to use some of Isabel's.... 
A natural consequence which means.... the laundry now is in the hampers in a timely fashion...
As far as the math stuff, well... If I let her just fall more and more behind she's going to have to retake this class next year and it will screw up the rest of her life!
Not really, it will just prolong the agony. The trick is to get her to do the homework, to struggle thru a bit, and then to eventually via repetition and practice "get" it. I am not planning to help her with math for 2 hours a night (where I take verbal abuse for 1.5 of those hours...) for the rest of her career. But hopefully the work ethic will eek in there if she knows she's not getting away with it. (Think of breaking a wild stallion here...)
*Sigh* *Big Sigh*...
To be fair for those of you who are maybe a wee bit apprehensive about the storm to come that is called preteen/tween:
I'm sure that Luanne and Kris would agree that there are moments with a tweener that are nice and fun. Kate does tell me stuff, and she wants me to know all about her "crushes" and her friends. It's not all bad! I like to talk to her now about sex, drugs, etc because she really listens and seems to be open to my opinions. She also always wants to play a game, or to watch a movie. She's not too busy to hang out with me. I also like to tell her about her physiological changes (Wonder of Girls book is helpful here) and to empathize (yes, it is hard to grow up and deal with amazing hormonal surges). These are good relationship building years-- but they are also draining like I never ever expected. It is like living with a hurricane sometimes. OK- maybe that's not very reassuring, but...
Anyway...
It is really hard to let natural consequences come when it's something like homework. I do let her have natural consequences of a dirty room for the most part--- a major one last year was that she didn't get her clothes into the laundry--- she had a pile of dirty clothes in her room at all times. She didn't like it much when she ran out of underwear (
I know, ick) and so had to use some of Isabel's.... A natural consequence which means.... the laundry now is in the hampers in a timely fashion...As far as the math stuff, well... If I let her just fall more and more behind she's going to have to retake this class next year and it will screw up the rest of her life!
Not really, it will just prolong the agony. The trick is to get her to do the homework, to struggle thru a bit, and then to eventually via repetition and practice "get" it. I am not planning to help her with math for 2 hours a night (where I take verbal abuse for 1.5 of those hours...) for the rest of her career. But hopefully the work ethic will eek in there if she knows she's not getting away with it. (Think of breaking a wild stallion here...)*Sigh* *Big Sigh*...
Comment