Hard questions - please - I need your help

[poky]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

It's hard. No one here would ever minimize that. I'm sorry that it sucks so badly for you right now.

I think we can all relate on one level or another. It *does* suck. Making friends can make all the difference, but I know how hard that is, too. From what others here have said, it can take up to a year to get to know new people and a new place well enough to feel comfortable. Give yourself that time. Yes, you made a decision with some major downsides, but it has upsides, too, right? Work on concentrating on those, if you can. Talk to your friends even though they're not right there; that's what phones and email are for.

You *will* get a chance, eventually, to concentrate on your career. You're still young; if my DH can *start* medical school at age 36, you'll be fine even if you have to put off your own advancement until after your husband's training is over.

Meanwhile, keep posting here; it's better than therapy.

Sorry you're so down right now.

[spotty_dog]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

You're not alone. It sucks and it's unfair, but I think you can get through it.

[Michele]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

Everywhere but Florida sucks!!!! I miss it so much too! And eventhough I didn't really like G'ville, it has a Macy's, something Shreveport LA doesn't know anything about!!! Ugh and everyone here says crazy things like Geaux Tigers!

Seriously, residency sucks....moving away from 'home' sucks...not seeing your spouse sucks.

[ud_grad]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

Hi again,
I posted to you earlier (in July?). I live in Philly and my best friend is from Harrisburg. I'm sorry you are having a tough time.

This may be a long shot but are you ever on thenest.com? I post over there and our local message board is pretty active. Every now and then we have get togethers and we have monthy mommy get togethers. Even though I'm from this area, I've made several friends this way.

Also look at meetup.com. There may be local groups you can join. They have groups for everything - runners clubs, Pomeranian owners clubs, financial clubs, etc.

The first year was the absolute hardest for me. It has gotten easier, and harder too with a child. Once I realized this won't be life forever and I got very independent and did things on my own and met other friends that had as much free time as I did, I became much more happy.

Hang in there and post here when you need to. We understand your frustrations.

[peggyfromwastate]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

WE are living the surgical intern life. Sounds like he's on a particularly bad rotation- will he switch to something nicer soon?

Have a good trip back to FL and hopefully things will look up. Cut yourself some slack, though, you have had an INCREDIBLY stressful last 6 months or so- big wedding, job search, moving, absent husband. These are major things.

Keep posting, even if you only feel depressed. It's very helpful to "get it out" in some form or another.

[houseelf]

Re: Hard questions - please - I need your help

Hi Lisa,

You'll never get any minimizing of your situation from me. Surgery residency with lots of years looming ahead in a strange new place represents a departure from most people's vision of their life. I wish you all the best. Come here anytime.

Kelly
(To recap...We're in our 8th year of surgical training...5 years g.s., 2 years research, 2 years of fellowship). I think I might understand where you're coming from.