How to join private group?

[JC76]

Hi. I'm new here and am having a hard time figuring out how to use the message board. Main reason I joined is talk about marriage related stuff and I can't figure out how to apply to join the private Marriage discussion group. It says to apply through Usergroups and I don't know what that means. Can anyone explain? thanks!!!

Welcome! We require that you have 50 posts before an administrator gives access to the private forums.

Tell us a little more about yourself.

[JC76]

Man, 50 posts... that's gonna take me forever. Thanks for the info though!

About myself:

I'm 32, married to a newly minted PGY3 Emergency Medicine resident. Just graduated from law school this spring and am currently studying for the bar exam (or SHOULD be studying and instead am posting here).

Also expecting a baby boy, due in early October.

Found this forum because I was searching for advice online about being married to a medical resident. We've been together for nearly 10 years, married for 6, so I've been through it all with him. We knew residency would be hard but I'm not a saint, nor is he, and we've been going through some tough times recently. I think we're both anticipating the additional stress that the baby is going to place on us in a few months and both are a little nervous.

I'm basically here hoping to find some support from women who are living a similar life to my own. Unfortunately there aren't many other wives in his program.

That's my story!

[ladymoreta]

Hi! Welcome! Looking forward to getting to know you! The 50 post requirement is just to make sure we have our privacy. And, you know, to keep our spouses from seeing what we're thinking.

[JC76]

I get the privacy thing completely. Trust me, I need a forum where I know I can speak frankly too.

47 more posts to go....

[MrsK]

Hello. I'm married to an intern and I am an attorney of 11+ years. You'll find that there are a lot of JD wives here and we discuss the law/medicine balancing act often. There is a JD/MD thread that fishes out a lot of the lawyers among us. Also, at least 6 of us are expecting babies (including myself) and several are due in Oct./Nov. You'll find a lot of supportive moms here.

Don't worry. You'll be at 50 posts in no time. Just look around at the open forums and jump right in.

[GrayMatterWife]

The first fifty posts go quickly!

Unless you're me. Then they are verbose. But, hey, everybody's got to have a signature style.

[Pollyanna]

Don't worry. You'll be at 50 posts in no time. Just look around at the open forums and jump right in.

Um, yeah. 50 posts will take no time and before you know it you'll be posting like 50X per day...

[rainbabies]

Hi and welcome

50 seems like a lot...but you'll have them in no time!

Check out these areas of the board:
Kids/infants/teens
Debates
Grand rounds
Pets
Arts and crafts
Retail therapy

I'm sure I'm forgetting some public areas....but I know you'll find something to post about

[DCJenn]

Back in the day (like 9 years ago) we had a rash of people who would join and then start asking odd questions and then we'd have to call them out by asking exactly which newspaper they were writing a lifestyle article for.

We get people who assume a LOT about the medical lifestyle (like the person who posted their French Riviera villa for sale. Yes, we all enjoyed that one over the mac and cheese and PB & Js)

You'll get there- trust me. My husband just shakes his head at the number of posts I have. Of course, he probably wouldn't have survived his residency and fellowship if I hadn't had the calm and soothing words of the sage groups of spouses here.

Jenn

[rainbabies]

LOL! I remember the villa. Weren't we taking Sven with us?

[oceanchild]

Also keep in mind you can post whatever you want in Grand Rounds. It's not like marriage issues can only go in the marriage section. All depends on your comfort level with public access.

[bokelley]

So after you reach the 50 post, Is there something that you need to do? You are going to LOVE this site. It has already helped me understand that I am not the only one out there!

[DCJenn]

Yes, when you reach 50, remind one of us admins who can increase the permissions.

Jenn

[JC76]

I've been skipping around reading posts for the last couple hours. I have to be honest, I already love it (and am wishing to god I'd found it 6 years ago when he started med school and I was working 50+ hours a week myself.) You all seem really, really great though. Am very happy to have found the community.

Being married to or in a relationship with someone in residency is such a unique challenge. We've watched a lot of relationships end in the last few years. Scary stuff. I don't think we're headed down that road by any stretch, but there are just times when I reach my limit and get tired of feeling like a martyr. Then we have it out, I pretty much get over it, until it pops up again a few months later after I've grown weary of being an angel.

Anyhow... sooooo glad I've found this place.