Hi All! I'm a brand new member after stumbling upon this wonderful site while looking for internet info regarding my husband's chosen profession. Some basic info about me and my hubby: We're originally from Colorado (and hoping to get back someday!) but are now in St Louis for med school (Go Cards!). My husband is in his last yr of med school and is currently on the road interviewing for neurosurgery residencies. Meanwhile, I'm a PA working in general surgery and the mom to two loving kitties (Torrey and Lady). They are good company while DH is away!
Anyway, I'm having a hard time coming to terms with DH's decision to pursue neurosurgery. I thought I had finally accepted it, but as Match Day gets closer, and residency and the life beyond become more realistic, I'm starting to freak out again. My husband truly has a passion for neuro and I know he'll need my support, esp over the next 7 yrs, but having a family life has always been my number one priority and I have a real fear that this may not be possible. In addition, working as a PA in surgery, while I am blessed because I have an idea of what to expect, I am also cursed for the same reason. While our hospital doesn't have a neurosurgeon, the two general surgeons I work with have not been shy in telling me (seemingly as often as they can) how hard neurosurgeons work and how you "couldn't pay (them) enough money" to have that kind of life. Additionally, our ENT actually started out in neurosurgery, and has told me that he and his wife feel that changing to ENT was the best decision he's ever made. All in all, this leaves me really scared for the future.
This is something I feel like I can't talk to others about. The general perception seems to be "What are you so worried about? You're going to be married to a neurosurgeon! You're set for life." Which is SO upsetting to me. I didn't marry a neurosurgeon. I married my college sweetheart who decided after 10 yrs together and 5 yrs of marriage that he wanted to be a neurosurgeon. Having him around for me and our (future) children is so much more important to me than any amount of money could be.
Wow, so sorry for the long introduction post. I guess I have a lot more pent-up feelings than I realized. But thank you for this great online community and for any advice/support/encouragement you can offer. I hope to get to know you all!
Anyway, I'm having a hard time coming to terms with DH's decision to pursue neurosurgery. I thought I had finally accepted it, but as Match Day gets closer, and residency and the life beyond become more realistic, I'm starting to freak out again. My husband truly has a passion for neuro and I know he'll need my support, esp over the next 7 yrs, but having a family life has always been my number one priority and I have a real fear that this may not be possible. In addition, working as a PA in surgery, while I am blessed because I have an idea of what to expect, I am also cursed for the same reason. While our hospital doesn't have a neurosurgeon, the two general surgeons I work with have not been shy in telling me (seemingly as often as they can) how hard neurosurgeons work and how you "couldn't pay (them) enough money" to have that kind of life. Additionally, our ENT actually started out in neurosurgery, and has told me that he and his wife feel that changing to ENT was the best decision he's ever made. All in all, this leaves me really scared for the future.
This is something I feel like I can't talk to others about. The general perception seems to be "What are you so worried about? You're going to be married to a neurosurgeon! You're set for life." Which is SO upsetting to me. I didn't marry a neurosurgeon. I married my college sweetheart who decided after 10 yrs together and 5 yrs of marriage that he wanted to be a neurosurgeon. Having him around for me and our (future) children is so much more important to me than any amount of money could be.
Wow, so sorry for the long introduction post. I guess I have a lot more pent-up feelings than I realized. But thank you for this great online community and for any advice/support/encouragement you can offer. I hope to get to know you all!
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