One Day Left!!

[alotofyarn]

Good luck!! The anticipation is killer, isn't it? I don't remember what plans we had, if any, but I do remember going back to work and spending the rest of the day looking at real estate listings for our new area. Not a very productive day, ha ha.

I've already spent entirely too much time looking at the real estate listings for our top 3!

[alotofyarn]

My husband, who is just the nicest guy in the world, was an unexpected, uncharacteristic total dickhead the day of match. Back then, NSG was an early match, with no pre-match day scramble for the non-matched. It was all extremely tense, given that NSG is such a tough match. My husband did not match at his #1 spot. He DID match at a program that was far better than his #1 match (which he had ranked as #1 only because he already had research collaborators there). He acted like a total jerk. He was completely disconnected; almost despondent. He was really disappointed. It was completely bizarre--people he didn't even know who heard where he'd match were stopping him at school to congratulate him, and he could barely muster a "thanks." The program he matched to had a really malignant reputation (which turned out not to be true) and he was really concerned he'd wash out or just not fit in.

I had planned this big surprise party for him, with about 25 friends. I'd made a big cake. I cancelled the party and threw out the cake, and didn't tell him about either for several years. His response was so out of character, I had no idea what to do.

He was like that for about three weeks. Just a total jerk. Finally, I told him, "Guys out there would cut off their left nut to match where you matched. So, either get on board with this, or decline the match and take a year off for research then match into another field. But don't take this incredible opportunity ungratefully. You were never entitled to match at your first choice. You are being an asshole, petulant child." Or something really, really close to those words.

After that, he decided to stop being a jerk and the rest is history.

Wow! I think my hubby could be in a mood if he doesn't get a program that we're excited about, but we had a really hard time deciding between our top 5 or so, so I'm pretty sure he'll be happy about any of those. Even now, he's second guessing his rankings, and I keep trying to help him relax, since we can't do anything about it now.

[alotofyarn]

Can you throw something quick together for the weekend if he's happy? My DH was also an early match and we had a small get together at our house that weekend with about a dozen close friends.

I probably can, but this week is crazy overall, with infertility procedures at some point (hopefully) and his stepdad passing away on Sunday. I think he may just want to relax at home, so we'll see.

[niener]

Good luck!!

[v-girl]

Good luck!

[Thirteen]

I would recommend a place/food that you would enjoy, regardless of the outcome. I don't necessarily think you won't match, but if the results are surprising in any way (for the worse), it might be good to be in a safe space to talk/listen.

(We matched, but not in a program we thought we would. Cue the Charlie Brown walk and sulk.)



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[MarissaNicole]

I probably can, but this week is crazy overall, with infertility procedures at some point (hopefully) and his stepdad passing away on Sunday. I think he may just want to relax at home, so we'll see.

A loss, fertility treatments and match! Crap that is a lot of sh*t to be dealing with right now!

It was such a relief to find out Monday that he matched... it allowed us to get excited for the actual match day. Good luck, thinking of you!

Wife to PGY3

[moonlight]

Good luck!

[alotofyarn]

A loss, fertility treatments and match! Crap that is a lot of sh*t to be dealing with right now!

I feel like at this point we're used to dealing with so much crap all at once. We were going through fertility treatments when he was doing his away rotations (hello conjugal visits while staying with the parents), and he interviewed during and after our miscarriage. I feel like it pretty much can't get worse at this point.

[diggitydot]

I feel like it pretty much can't get worse at this point.

Uh, don't give the universe a goal. That's like asking for a shit bomb to land in your laps.



I'm so sorry that things have sucked recently. Here's to hoping they begin looking up considerably in the immediate future.

[SuzySunshine]

Do they not find out IF they matched ahead of time like they do in the regular match? Big big hugs, I hope you get some sleep tonight!

[MDPhDWife]

We were early match too. We were soooo worried we weren't going to match at all because it felt like such a long shot so we didn't plan anything. We rented a bunch of movies and planned on staying in. The computers for SF Match crashed that morning so it was probably close to 10 or 11 AM when we finally found out we matched at our number one. DH had dozed off on the couch (he's a ridiculously zen guy who totally balances out my control freak personality) while I was busy compulsively checking the computer. I found out before he did and he awoke to my screaming like a banshee. I tackled him and knocked him over causing him to hit his head on our hardwood floor. Then we spent the morning dancing around the house in our PJ's. We seriously had such low expectations that we were shocked at our luck to not only match, but at our #1. I think we ultimately ended up going out to dinner to celebrate, but really didn't have plans.

Good luck and make sure to keep us posted!

[poky]

Do they not find out IF they matched ahead of time like they do in the regular match? Big big hugs, I hope you get some sleep tonight!

It makes sense; if they don't match, they just scramble with the regular match scramble, no? Does seem harsh to have to find out IF and WHERE both at once, though! 12 hours or so to go, right? Best of luck with all of it!

[Urowife]

My DH is a urologist, and he went through the match 8 years ago! It was the first year they did the computerized match, and the schmuck who wrote the algorithm got it backwards. So, they released the results, and big name programs (think Mayo) went unfilled. My DH matched at #19 out of 20 on his list. He was pretty devastated. They realized what happened and retracted the match later that day. It took them 3 or 4 days to re-do the results. And then, DH matched at #5, I think. Anyway, it was a clusterf*ck. I am so glad to be done with the training phase.

On a brighter note, we are currently vacationing with my DH's co-resident and his family and having an absolute blast. So we did get a fantastic friendship out of the hell called residency.

Anyway, good luck! And welcome to urology! I think it's a pretty good specialty

[weeniegeniewife]

Anyway, good luck! And welcome to urology! I think it's a pretty good specialty

I completely agree!