Any advice for dealing with people thinking you are "bragging"?

[GrayMatterWife]

Thread-jack:

I stopped trying to explain neurosurgery because of the reaction I frequently got from the under-25 set. The group of people who, regardless of socio-economic, racial, ethnic, educational, or other background, cannot carry on a conversation without every third "sentence" including the interjection "like." The abusive, pointless, mindless expression of a disconnection with reality.

Over and over and over: "Oh, so he's...like...a brain surgeon?"

No. He's ACTUALLY a brain surgeon. He's not a simulated version. He does not live only in your FaceBook universe. The truth of his existence is not relative. He didn't go to virtual college or virtual medical school or a virtual residency. He is neck-deep (literally!) in reality every damn day.

[Thirteen]

My wife, who is an emergency room doctor, doesnt like to talk about herself.
She just says she works in a hospital. When asked what are she explains; "I work in the complaint department"

😂


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[EvieLee]

Thank you everyone for your responses, I really appreciate every one of your pearls of wisdom. I must say I feel slightly silly now, I realise the whole NSG is an outrageously long and tough road, in fact I am VERY VERY confident that I have absolutely NO IDEA what I am getting myself into That being said I don't want people to get the wrong impression of me on here as being totally hopelessly naive or a bragger etc etc, so should I remove the 'aspiring neurosurgeon' from my signature?

[Deebs]

This is the place you can come and brag, or vent, etc. I think you should leave "aspiring neurosurgeon." You two might end up on that path, or it might change. If it does, you can change your signature then. My DH had an email account that was something about being a PICU doc. He ended up going into EM. It isn't bad to have a goal, or to change that goal.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[poky]

Thank you everyone for your responses, I really appreciate every one of your pearls of wisdom. I must say I feel slightly silly now, I realise the whole NSG is an outrageously long and tough road, in fact I am VERY VERY confident that I have absolutely NO IDEA what I am getting myself into That being said I don't want people to get the wrong impression of me on here as being totally hopelessly naive or a bragger etc etc, so should I remove the 'aspiring neurosurgeon' from my signature?

The "no idea what I am getting myself into" is where being here will help; most of us have been there and done that, and know as much or more about the training process as our spouses do (I've definitely learned things here that my husband wasn't aware of!). And like Deebs said, I think it's fine to leave "aspiring neurosurgeon" in your signature if you want to; we get it.
I *so* get your dilemma with being SO PROUD and wanting to shout it from the rooftops but at the same time not wanting to deal with the incorrect assumptions people have about the process and the profession. It's fine to be super-proud, but as others have said, it makes sense to couch it in realistic terms, and try to head off some of those assumptions at the pass.

[EvieLee]

Thank you.
I was telling my partner yesterday how I had found this network and how wonderful it had been already. It has been pretty lonely over here in Aus so you are all making a big difference to me already

[alotofyarn]

You should leave it! Says the girl who had PhD in her email shortly after she got accepted to the program and purchased a drslastname web domain before either of us actually finished our doctoral degrees.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

[JDAZ11]

I agree. My husband is also a neurosurgeon, and I avoid telling people that at almost all costs. No way I would have even thought to mention that when he was still in med school. And honestly, it's rare that anything good comes out of anyone knowing. We try to hide all scrubs, journals, books etc when someone is coming over to give us a quote for work. I absolutely think people charge us more if they find out. Also - on vacation a few times during residency - restaurant suggestions from B&B owners were insanely priced when they found out. And the truth is - it will be a LONG time (although I have no idea how things work over there) before you have brain surgeon kind of money. It's just annoying for people to think you're insanely wealthy when you aren't even close.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[alotofyarn]

I agree. My husband is also a neurosurgeon, and I avoid telling people that at almost all costs. No way I would have even thought to mention that when he was still in med school. And honestly, it's rare that anything good comes out of anyone knowing. We try to hide all scrubs, journals, books etc when someone is coming over to give us a quote for work. I absolutely think people charge us more if they find out. Also - on vacation a few times during residency - restaurant suggestions from B&B owners were insanely priced when they found out. And the truth is - it will be a LONG time (although I have no idea how things work over there) before you have brain surgeon kind of money. It's just annoying for people to think you're insanely wealthy when you aren't even close.

This too! I'm pretty sure we got quoted a lot more for something once when hubby was home in his scrubs. From now on he's only allowed to tell people he's a nurse if he's in scrubs. He also started getting charged more at a dry cleaner once after he brought his med school white coat in.

[MrsK]

This is where it comes in handy that people don't know the difference between a psychiatrist and psychologist. People don't know that psychiatrists are doctors.

[rufflesanddots]

Charging a med student more money.... where's a smoking head on fire emoji when you need one?

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk

[MrsK]

Honestly though, it's not just doctors that get stigmatized. When I was single /dating, I used to avoid telling people that I was a lawyer. Aside from all the talk about money, there was a presumption that lady lawyers are aggressive and bitchy.

[Pollyanna]

Just tell folks he's thinking about OB/GYN, that pretty much stops all conversation. Aside from comments like, "does that bother you....?"

[Thirteen]

Just tell folks he's thinking about OB/GYN, that pretty much stops all conversation. Aside from comments like, "does that bother you....?"

😄


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[medpedspouse]

Just tell folks he's thinking about OB/GYN, that pretty much stops all conversation. Aside from comments like, "does that bother you....?"

ORRR you can say Infectious Diseases....that can stop a convo fast!